1000 thoughts on her mind.. Penning them down seemed like a more efficient way to sort of manage them,, so she thought.
But worth the try, don’t you think?
It had been noted that this certain matter was getting a little out of hand and if she doesn't find a way to figure herself out soon, she will become the looser at the end of the day.
A sore one as a matter of fact.
And nobody likes a sore looser.
Most, if not all, of her energy was focused on you and without getting closure, she will not be able to give herself to others fully as she did mentally to you.
She has to rewire her brain and try convince herself that the grass isn't greener on the other side.
She was more than willing to find out but the situation-ship you were/are in can not allow her in any way possible to do that.. as feelings would get hurt and some did get hurt in the process.
She’s sorry for making both of you believe that you was meant to be. She did infact feel it and knew she would love you till the very end.
Is it absurd to say that she still loves you? Is it infatuation? Is it lust? Is it missing out on what she thought could have been?
She keeps thinking of the life you would have had, had things gone the right way.
But maybe they did go the right way..
What she means to say is.. had things gone their way.