Identity house of mirrors

It’s another Morning Page, feeling pretty sleepy,
won’t trip feeling trippy from waking up early.

Maybe it’s a symptom of being 32,
this tiredness before your morning brew.
Ya you know it’s not, this ain’t some illness,
it’s just what happens when you sleep a little less, too late.
No need to blame yourself for the lethargy
coming from you late night activities -
you enjoyed the botched attempts at recording
a reading of yesterday’s story.

It got better over time
with practice your rhymes were flowing out of your lips,
looking more and more like you’re shooting from your hip.

But why were you so concerned with looking a certain way?
Like being strange is something others will find lame?
Why let myself be tamed by some sense of self I want to maintain?

Identity is this funny thing you see,
if you want to “be like water” a la Bruce Lee
so that you can be whatever you’d like to be,
you need to be free of your ego’s will
to stay still or be this picture perfect still life of you.

I want to be able to be true to the me
that comes from the deep stirrings of my creativity,
that forms free from the shifting lake of norms,
that shapes within the lake of transcendent possibilities.

Like a glowing bright white light,
shooting up from the water to take flight,
my imagination set afire and alight,
imagining the heights in my minds eye,
a rolling wave of what can take place if I set myself free
from the binds and expectations
that my ego’s constructed imitations
sets in front of me.

It’s a hall of mirrors that always has clear steer doors,
it seems easy to fall into one of those flawed still reflections.
Each one of them is indeed a version of me
but none encompasses any of my raw totality.

You see, your ego is only able to perceive
a limited subset of what begets your identity.
It’s limited by lack of subconscious
that is steeped in your soul’s lake
that is fed from the ever-flowing rivers of your memories
and sourced from the cumulous clouds of your desires,
raindrops of fire that each inspire action.

Following that age old maxim that
belief begets thought begets action begets destiny.
You see, it’s important to remember what you do and say
is a side-effect.
The you that others see is just an afterimage of
your past self’s umbrage,
the shadow effect of your past intellect.

Who you are determines your destiny’s North star,
and the course of your arc is always changing
as it blazes its own trail,
a comet across fate,
brief but beautiful and a sight upon which you wish
for a chance to feel
the beauty, the majesty of the night sky,
all before night sets on nigh.

Maybe that’s enough waxing poetic
on the nature of life eidetic.

Less writing with knowing you plan on posting this,
more insight driven lines that come from
the source inside of you.

What speaks to you?
What are you present to?
That you’ve yet to get on making that cup of coffee dude?
That today is gonna be a mad long day of meetings?

Oof it’s gonna be long but that’s okay, be strong.
Or not, you can twist the plot if you need to,
to let yourself be the true you.
All things will come in time to you as you need them to.

That hallway of ego mirrors is eager to deliver answers
to problems you’re so ready to invent.
Just remember instead to vent,
to relent on yourself and try your best
to live life gratefully instead of head strongly.

Anyway, this morning you feel al little spent.
Let’s go catch some new tasty fish for throwing
into your creative lake bed.



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Nick Hong

Eng Manager @ Medium. Life coach, amateur poet, kickboxer. Dancing through life.