INFLUENTIAL LEADER: ‘STUCK’ IS A STATE OF MIND AND YOU CAN COME OUT OF IT
I reconnected with a friend who is also my accountability partner recently. We had not been in touch for over six months, so there was quite a lot to catch up on. As we reflected on each other’s progress, we were both pleasantly surprised by the strides made despite what seemed to be big moments of being ‘stuck.’
At the beginning of Covid19, like most people, we felt stuck. That period took us out of our routine. Every day felt like the movie ‘Groundhog Day; reliving the same day and even more terrifying was being stuck watching statistics of more and more people losing lives. As time went on, we realized we had to choose differently and believe differently. That is when things started to turn for the better.
We reflected on the concept of being ‘stuck’ and defined it as a state of mind. The prison is not the circumstances we find ourselves in but our minds. The most positive thing about this is that we possess the power to alter our state of mind. The truth of the matter is, often, when we feel stuck — the ability to get unstuck is not on the person or the event we are waiting for to happen. If we know this, there is hope to notice these moments and find ways to get out of them faster.
This article is essential as we are beginning a new year. You may have all the wishes on how you would like to effect changes in your life, yet the uncertainty still lingers on. You may want to make a career change, but you feel it is more complicated because the market seems to be closed or moving slowly. Either way, leaving everything to fate can be debilitating; you have to take charge and have some control over where your life is headed. That gives you the boost of confidence and the zest of positive energy you need.
When you are stuck, you feel separate and somehow knocked out of the flow of life. You cannot seem to access your imagination, and you may seem like you are going in circles. It feels like the whole world is moving and leaving you behind. A spiral of frustration and disillusion begins, and a negative emotional charge takes over. Left on its own, it can lead us to an even deeper hole that we will struggle for a while to emerge from.
Often, it is essential to notice it and allow it for a little while to process what is going on. You have to be determined to get out of it at some point. Getting started is usually the thing standing between us and forward motion.
Here are a few suggestions on how you can work yourself out of this:
- Pause and see your situation for what it is
Sometimes, all we need to do is to pause. Pausing is powerful because it is self-directed and intends to do it temporarily. Trying to push against the grain when in a rut can be counterproductive. Sometimes we need to pause and reflect on why we are stuck.
It is so important to view your situation in context. Sometimes, realize that your case is similar to everybody else, as with Covid19 lockdowns. Similarly, the beginning of 2022 globally feels like a false start. Context gives you a perspective on how to deal with it. It is also powerful to know that you are not the first person in the world to become stuck, you will not be the last, and indeed, you will come out of it.
- Stop waiting for the right time
The time at home comes with many gifts. You need to identify these for yourself. Personally, I do not have to be in traffic in the early morning and have developed a habit of using that time to write. My brain is at its best in the mornings, so I use that creative burst to write articles.
Being locked up because of the pandemic landed us with time in our hands to think of all the things we always wanted to do. The usual response though was often, ‘when we go back to normal. How about looking at things you can do now? If the routine has to change in the future, you would have at least developed a lifelong beneficial habit.
Dr. Angela Yu wrote a beautiful article: When you feel stuck. She states, ‘ If you want to become unstuck, just start doing. Your hands are steady; your thoughts are fleeting. My one app became fifty apps, and I went from teaching myself to teaching over one million students worldwide.’
- Try out new things
There are so many new things one can learn at this time, and you have the benefit of the internet, which can help direct you to exciting skills. It can be incredibly uncomfortable and daunting to start something new.
In this time, I have learned so many skills that will benefit me for the future and the role I fulfill in my professional life. For example, I took a plunge and started a Podcast that was horrible at first but, with time, helped me improve on skills that are becoming quite useful. That Podcast was spotted by a global network that has offered me a slot to reach an even bigger audience. Would I have come across this if I did not have the guts to post my first horrible video? Definitely not.
If you have been putting off many things you wanted to do, I encourage you to start small. The small incremental learnings will add up, and before long, you will have the momentum to grow that confidence and do more.
- Ask for help
It is ok to ask for help. Sometimes it is good to reach out to someone who is doing something you are interested in and seek help. They may say something that can be the exact word you need at that moment to shift you forward. Coaches are beneficial for helping us to navigate areas where we feel stuck. They help us to find the answers on our own.
- Break the cycle of worry and work on something else
If you have been working on a project and feel stuck, try to do something else to break the pattern of being stuck. This provides you with a new flow of energy and alternatives to move forward.
Lastly, be kind to yourself; you are doing the best you can.