Artemis Fowl (2020)
A fun and whimsical film sans the fun and whimsy.
I only vaguely remember reading the Artemis Fowl books when I was in middle school. I think I made it through the first three books and never got around to reading any more of them. I remember Artemis being an interesting genius who saw himself as the bad guy, with loads of heart underneath. While the books center heavily on a world of magic and fairies, I mainly remember the adventures and the elaborate heists. These concepts piqued my interest and stirred creativity in me. I’ve always loved heist stories, and the fact that Artemis Fowl was a heist book for kids was great fun for me.
As an adult, I didn’t have high hopes for the Artemis Fowl movie, especially when I learned that it was a Disney film. More and more, Disney is becoming synonymous in my mind as a company that destroys beloved things from my childhood. Artemis Fowl is no exception to this. While I don’t remember the books all that well, this movie was still pretty awful. It’s pretty bad as both an adaptation and a stand-alone film. As the credits rolled, I couldn’t help but wonder how much longer people will continue paying for subpar content like this.
Disney films used to spark wonder and magic in my mind. I was transported to these fantastical lands and onto these grand adventures with quirky and unusual friends. And each film always had at…
