Meditation For The Modern Alphamale
Having a regular mindfulness practice can help you better embody the traits of a truly “Alpha” man.
In male dominated communities in the U.S., men rarely, if ever, acknowledge the validity and value of meditation or midfulness. This phenomenon results from a prevailing cultural mindset that sees emerging movements that break from social norms as “Beta.” For those of you unfamiliar with the term, “Beta” is an adjective used to describe an action or trait of a lesser man (betamale). The primary determining factor of how a trend is labeled in the mainstream correlates closely to whether it deals in simplistic platitudes or nuanced truths. Because trends that deal in simplistic platitudes are easy to understand, they tend to gain cultural traction more quickly than more complex trends dealing in nuanced truths. Meditation, or a regular practice of mindfulness, is a movement growing in popularity that deals entirely in nuanced truths. The Modern Alphamale must have the ability to deal in these nuanced truths and meditation stands ready to become the bedrock on which successes of Modern Alphamales will be built.
What Makes a Modern Alphamale?
The idea of a Modern Alphamale cannot be relegated to a few adjectives and an attempt to do so would result in the juxtaposition of contradicting terms. A phrase comes close to capturing what “Modern Alphamale” means:
A man who walks through his world with ease.
To borrow a concept from Steven R. Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, a Modern Alphamale has entirely mastered the dependence and independence paradigms. This means a Modern Alphamale has moved on from being dependent on others in order to sustain himself physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Many men stop at this point and believe that reaching the paradigm of independence is the pinnacle of lifetime achievement. However, a higher paradigm of interdependence exists in which individuals can collaborate to achieve more than the sum of their separate efforts.
The Modern Alphamale acknowledges that although he can survive and even thrive by being independent, interdependence is how he will achieve greatness. For a man to achieve the interdependence paradigm, he must be completely at ease in his world so that he can make himself vulnerable. Consider: you are considering going into business with someone, but they are always guarded around you and always choose their words carefully. Would you have apprehensions in doing business with them? I certainly would! However, the man at ease in conversation, who clearly speaks his mind and expresses his opinions unapologetically has no trouble finding likeminded people to do business with. This anecdote lends credence to the idea that:
You do not attract what you want, you attract what you are.
The men currently in the independent or dependent paradigms will find it difficult to identify what paradigm they reside in because they are likely not practicing much introspection. This leads to confusion and frustration on the part of men going through the motions of life as they were told to by their parents. For the most part, the mainstream narrative postulates that working hard, making money, and winning awards is what makes a person happy. However, when a man goes through the difficult process of achieving excellence in sports, academics, or career but does not enjoy his life, he has failed. Suffering from internal unhappiness negates any external success a man might experience. As Tony Robbins expresses this idea:
Achievement without fulfillment is the ultimate failure.
Meditation for Self Awareness
A Modern Alphamale can avoid the trap of living an externally successful but unfulfilling life by achieving self awareness. A self aware man has looked inside himself and realized he is not his thinking mind. This shift in perspective allows a man to live a proactive rather than reactive life. He allows his mind to respond to external stimuli as it likes, but waits until his emotional reaction has subsided to take action. Observing the mind as it goes through its process of thought loops and reacting to external stimuli is often referred to as mindfulness. Becoming a mindful individual means that you have come to the realization that you are not your thoughts, you are the observer behind the thoughts. This realization is nearly impossible to explain further and is best understood through guided meditation. The Headspace App is a great starting point on this journey.
Killing the Boy
In modern society, most rites of passage that had been commonly practiced in tribal societies have been eliminated, and for good reason. The practicality of training boys to excel as foot soldiers from age 7–29 has declined since the year 400 B.C. However, trying experiences such as the Spartan Agoge forced boys to think like men by searing away bullshit thoughts and concerns. For example, who gives a sh*t whether you look cool or not when you are tracking a wild animal through the woods attempting not to starve to death? [Note: The Modern Alphamale gives zero fucks about what people think of him when he is on his purpose] Some circles call this mental shift killing the boy. Since most young men have not had the opportunity to experience a trial like an Agoge, they have not been forced to let go of these useless thought patterns in favor of more practical mental modes. As strange as it may sound, meditation provides a surprisingly practical method of achieving similar mental clarity.
Practicing meditation allows space between a man and his thoughts. This separation allows him to take stock of how his mind is operating and whether he is expending valuable mental and emotional capital on pointless of counterproductive thoughts. This clarity helps to prioritize a man’s life and helps to identify useless thought patterns that most men probably don’t even realize they are falling into. By identifying pointless thinking traps, a man begins the process of eliminating them so that he reserves more mental RAM to problem solve. This improvement in thinking clarity decreases indecision, procrastination, and allows for more creative thought. In group situations, the Modern Alphamale becomes the leader by default because when a problem arises he possesses the mental clarity required to remain unaffected by the situation. When environmental hardship leaves a man emotionally unaffected, he is free to take necessary action. This is the quintessential quality of the Modern Alphamale, he realizes that every situation is an opportunity. In the words of Tony Robbins:
Life happens for him, not to him.
To be clear, the results of meditation are far from immediate. Months or years can be required to achieve the type of mental clarity it takes to act as a Modern Alphamale. In addition, meditation requires that a man sit with his thoughts with no external stimulus. To some men, this task sounds impossible due to sheer boredom. Other men look inside themselves and are unable to confront what they find in their own psyche. If you find yourself in either of these categories, incorporating a mindfulness practice will benefit your daily life more than you think is even possible.
If you enjoyed reading this piece, please let me know by giving it a little green heart! If you LOVED it, I have good news! I plan on writing an ongoing series concerning how a Modern Alphamale can live a life that is fulfilling internally while f***ing crushing it in external life. The topics will range from relationships and dating to business building to social media usage. If you want to audit me and see if I am practicing what I’m preaching, hit me up on social:
IG/TWTR: @brad_backhand
FB: /bradbackhand
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