Racial Imposter Syndrome
Diamond Rypka is the host of The Asian Tales podcast, created to highlight, share and educate us on the Asian community and culture. Asian Tales shares life journeys and experiences of Asian-American lives.
Diamond Rypka is half-Japanese and was born in Red Bluff, California, now relocated to Melbourne, Australia. She is a Miss Asian Global & America 2020 candidate and was awarded Miss Asian Congeniality, for demonstrating and embodying the spirit of genuine warmth and sincerity.
Find out more about Diamond Rypka:
- Instagram: @diamondrypka
- Asian Tales Podcast on Anchor, Google, Spotify, ListenNotes and PodBay
- LinkedIn: Diamond Rypka
- Facebook: @drypka
- Twitter: @DiamondRypka
- TikTok: diamondrypka
Watch the Imagine Talks Podcast interview on YouTube below —
Photo use permission provided by Diamond Rypka.
Getting underway with Diamond Rypka
Francis Kong: Well, welcome everyone to Imagine Talks Podcast. Achieving success through social impact, overcoming obstacles. And my name is Francis Kong.
Tammy Tran: And I’m Tammy Tran. For today’s episode, we will be introducing Diamond Rypka, who is the host of The Asian Tales Podcast. We’ll be talking about her personal journey through life and what led her to creating The Asian Tales podcast.
So, Diamond, can you tell us about where you’re from? What are some of the key highlights, highlights that help shaped your life today and your journey?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah, absolutely. First off, thank you so much for inviting me onto the show, I really appreciate it. Hello, everyone! My name is Diamond Rypka.
I was born in California, in a small city called Red Bluff. It’s in Northern California. The true Northern California, I know; when I went to school in San Luis Obispo everyone thought San Francisco was Northern California, but there is a lot more land above San Francisco.
So, I’m from Red Bluff, California, [a] small town. Ended up going down to San Luis Obispo for my Bachelor’s degree, and then I went off to China for my Master’s and now I’m living in Australia, so I do enjoy traveling and going around the world. I’m sorry, could you repeat the rest of the question?
Tammy Tran: Yeah, certainly. What are some of the key highlights that helped shaped your life today?
Key Highlights — Traveling & Education
Diamond Rypka: Oh yes, yes, so traveling obviously was a big part — as was education.
So, I grew up in a household where I was allowed to pretty much do anything I wanted as long as I got good grades and did sports and I was very involved with the academic lifestyle.
So, this actually led me to go on to college and to San Luis Obispo where it’s quite progressive down there at Cal Poly and they really encourage you to do a lot of things, try a lot of new activities and one of the things that I wanted to try was studying abroad, but I didn’t know how to fit it into my schedule at the time. What ended up happening was I just thought about it for four years and then my senior years, I’m walking through the hallway not knowing what I’m going to do with the rest of my life.
I actually saw a flyer for the master’s program in China, and my dad lived in China at the time working. So, I thought this is a sign from the universe, that means I need to go to China, so I went off to China and I studied over there. And the reason why I really enjoyed living in China was… I am half Japanese. And, growing up, I felt like I didn’t get to be involved with the Asian culture as much as I really wanted to. So, living in China sort of filled an emptiness that I wanted to experience in my life. However, afterward, when I came back, I felt kind of shameful at the same time because I thought,
“Man, I just spent three years living in China, when I could have spent three years living in Japan and connecting with my own cultural roots.”
So, it was kind of interesting. So, I felt this turmoil inside of me that I’d always felt growing up in high school and at Cal Poly and just basically my whole life, I felt this turmoil of, “Am I really Japanese enough? Am I not?”
All of these life experiences and combinations coming together sort of led me to where I am now. I did a…Asian Beauty Pageant last year, which was really fun, something new. I’ve never done a beauty pageant before and I had never been so involved in the Asian American Community.
I know Miss Asian Global is a global pageant but there was a lot of Asian Americans who participated in the pageant and being involved with them and being — I don’t want to say forced because it’s not forced — but, you know, I had to talk with everyone, we had to share stories, we had shared life events. Things like that and just being in that environment opened up my eyes to…what’s the word I’m thinking of — just a different perspective on the community that I didn’t know that I could have or that was there in the first place so yeah that’s sort of shaped who I am today, and this is me now. Hi!
What is Racial Imposter Syndrome?
Tammy Tran: Wow. That’s actually a lot and it’s amazing that you were able to come to the, you know, the conclusion that you went to China. You discover the culture there and then you’ve come to reflect upon yourself. Wanting to better yourself, you want to learn more about culture and just inspiring other people to learn about their culture, too, and that full “Imposter Syndrome” type of thing.
Diamond Rypka: Yeah, exactly right. So, I had recently given a talk at Imagine Talks about Racial Imposter Syndrome. And the premise of my talk was: growing up, I experienced Japanese culture with my grandparents, being babysat there, because both my grandparents — Oh! Sorry. Not both of my grandparents. My grandparents on my mom’s side. My grandpa and grandma. They’re full Japanese. So, growing up and living a Japanese lifestyle with them seemed very normal, but I lived a very American lifestyle and my immediate family home, and school, and all of that.
But as I aged and became a teenager and became into my own person and was starting to develop my own ideologies, I felt like I wasn’t Japanese enough. I wanted to be more. I wanted to speak Japanese. I wanted to do the traditions. I wanted this, I wanted that. So, Imagine Talks, I basically discussed how this led me to develop a big case of “Racial Imposter Syndrome.”
I was ashamed, I felt like I was not worthy enough to be Japanese because I didn’t speak the language. I don’t know the food; I don’t know the culture; I don’t know the difference between a yukata and a kimono, you know. All of those so that’s what I talked about at Imagine Talks and how that led me to open conversation with other individuals about the same issue.
The Asian Tales Podcast by Diamond Rypka
Tammy Tran: Yeah. And I know you mentioned to us earlier that because of that, that’s what led you to create The Asian Tales podcast. Can you tell us more about the podcast? And what inspired you to really create the podcast as it is?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah. So I was inspired to create the podcast during the beauty pageant that I participated in Miss Asian Global. And the conversation that inspired me was actually between myself and Olivia Wong, who is Miss Asian Global 2020. And we were — we had just arrived early on our rehearsal day or something like that. Not arrived, obviously.
Diamond Rypka: It wasn’t in-person, but we got on the Zoom call early and we were just chatting with each other and sharing stories. And one of the stories I shared with her was when I was in high school, I used to tell people that I was way more Japanese than I was: that we spoke Japanese at home, we had special dinners every weekend.
We ate with hashi, which are chopsticks. I wore kimonos for all of the wonderful events that we had that were Japanese, really. All lies, that none of that was true. We probably did eat a lot more Japanese food…but mainly all lies…and I was sharing this with her and I told her, I was like,
“I just feel so ashamed doing that.”
I feel like it is a big lie that’s constantly in my face, especially when people ask, “Oh, what are you?” and I say, “Oh, I’m Japanese,” and they go, “Oh, can you speak the language?”
So when I was in high school, and I tell people I could. But it’s just a lie. It’s just a big lie. A smack-in-the-face lie. And Olivia really connected and she said:
On the opposite hand, she went into school telling people that she wasn’t Chinese-American that she was — I think she said — Portuguese and Filipino maybe. I forgot which ethnicity she said. But, basically, that she used to lie because she just didn’t want to be connected to it, because growing up, she had seen stereotypes connected to it. Obviously, now she’s super-proud to be Chinese-American, and she’s a great representation [for Miss] Asian Global everything, but when we’re growing up and we’re at that age where we’re trying to fit in or make — make ourselves this presence that we want to be, you know we just connected and after this conversation.
I had this Wow! moment, this Aha! moment. I’m not the only one that thinks this. I’m not the only one that thinks this way.
Granted, I said I was more, and she said she was less, but like I was lying about really, how much I was. And so is she. And so, this conversation just led me to think, and think, and think, and I just acted on it, maybe like two or three weeks later, I announced to everyone in the cohort I was like,
“I’ve made a podcast. Anyone who wants to come chat with me. Come on, and we’re going to do this. Because I just want this.”
Breaking Through Racial Imposter Syndrome From Multiracial Experiences
Diamond Rypka: I think it’s so important. I felt so enlightened, and had such a weight lifted off my shoulder when she had shared this tale with me.
And…another one of the gals — Daisy — she’s one of the princesses from Miss Asian Global. Daisy told me that she learned Japanese, she’s Chinese. She learned Japanese and I had learned Chinese and I’m Japanese. And so, we sort of shared this connection of,
“Gosh, should we have learned our own language? Our own like cultural language?
And so, just sharing all of these conversations with each other, I was feeling these big burdens and weights of identity lifted from my shoulder and I wanted to do this for other people. Younger individuals, individuals my age, older individuals who may feel uncomfortable just anyone.
So, I created The Asian Tales as a platform and a space for anybody with an Asian background to just share their own unique tales and their life journey and experiences and just share them. You don’t know who you could touch or connect with and who’s going to look towards you as this beacon of — I’m not the only one — and of course, during Imagine Talks, I had to do a lot of research on Racial Imposter Syndrome. And then I realized, “oh, this is why I’m feeling so good, I love this,” yada yada yada, so that was the birth of The Asian Tales.
Tammy Tran: That’s amazing. That’s so inspiring and I love how like you just took action right after speaking with Olivia. And then having all these other people that you spoke to and did identify with.
Diamond Rypka: Yeah, it was really like, bim bam boom! Here’s The Asian Tales, guys!
Steven Chan: So, Diamond, what are some of the things that you have talked about include a lot of stories from many other people that you’ve met in the pageant world. What are some of your more memorable guests that you’ve interviewed so far for The Asian Tales podcast?
Diamond Rypka: I actually just interviewed a young woman named Sylvia Wakana. She is a Japanese-American food blogger.
And the reason why she’s one of my most memorable guests is because she’s half-Japanese and she had the life that I used to imagine myself having, which I just found really fascinating. So, she grew up in [Los Angeles]. Her mom spoke Japanese to her, so she can speak Japanese and she used to go to Tokyo every summer. I think she still does.
And it was just amazing asking her questions about food, which was a big lie that I used to tell about when I was younger. Culture. We shared stories about anime, because I think that a lot of people don’t think that I watch anime. I don’t know why you would think that, but I am a huge anime fan.
I love anime, I love reading manga, all of that stuff — so we just had a really good conversation, and I think it was really memorable because it was a really light-hearted conversation. There was no negative aspects to it whatsoever…
And for me personally, I don’t ask a lot of questions that I wanted to know when I was younger, you know, so there was a part that was really fulfilled and really satisfying by speaking with her, and she’s so lovely. She’s so so nice.
What are nuances amongst Asians?
Steven Chan: And you know it just captures a lot of the differences in the variety of experiences, rich experiences that Asian-Americans have, and you know, through your journey. What are some of the nuances amongst Asians that you’ve learned?
You’ve experienced Asians in California, Asians in China as a majority culture, and certainly, I imagine you’ve heard of stories from Asians and Australia as well.
Diamond Rypka: I’m glad you asked me this question because, as I had mentioned earlier, I think traveling is really important and played a huge part in my life, and I think speaking with new individuals from other countries is really important for everyone because everyone’s lifestyle is very different.
Diamond Rypka: Now, obviously, I can only speak to my own experiences. Now I can’t speak for anyone else who’s met other people so from my own experiences. The individuals that I’ve met of all the Asian individuals I’ve met. The ones in China were most intriguing to me because of the Chinese culture. I live in Australia now and Australia has a Western culture very similar to the U.S., so the Asians that I meet here really doesn’t feel any different than the Asians in the U.S.
But when I went to China, there was a bunch of aspects of curiosity that I think you don’t meet with other Asians in the U.S. or in America because they want to know what I experienced in Western culture, and I want to know what they experienced in Eastern culture. I want to know what ‘The Real Authentic Asian Life’ is.
But really it’s for them they’re like: it’s not exciting, this is how we live every single day, you know and they wanted to know about me they’re like,
“Oh, you’re Asian American? What do you do there? Do you speak the language? Do you eat traditional food?”
And I’m like, “Not at all.” One bit, but that’s why I love meeting you guys and when I went to Australia.
It’s interesting in Australia because my partner is Taiwanese-Chinese, and his grandmother is from Taiwan. So, there’s a lot of cultural aspects. For example, we just had Chinese New Year dinner with her and the family here. So, I feel a lot more involved in traditions with the Asians that I’ve met here, but I think that’s because of my circumstance, I am dating an Asian person. Therefore, I am involved with their Asian lifestyle.
So, the Asians that I’ve met outside of my partner and his family. It’s very similar to the US, similar to the culture depends on your parents. Are they first generation, second generation? Depends on where you went to school. Did you go to language school growing up? Did you just go to Australian school? or US public school? Something like that. So, it’s very interesting because I think the major differences were between people living in Eastern countries versus people living in Western-style countries, those are the two main differences.
Can Racial Imposter Syndrome creep into the workplace too?
Steven Chan: That really reminds me of some of my friends is experiences in Hawaii, where it’s a majority Asian culture, so technically it’s Asian-American.
But then they don’t really feel that being Asian is unusual or unique. It’s just a majority culture.
So, you’ve talked quite a bit about what it’s been like growing up, but also in personal life too, some of the traditions that you have been partying with family. Thinking about the workplace: you’ve worked in many different settings, and I imagine that sometimes Racial Imposter Syndrome may creep into the workplace too. Maybe it affects people’s performance. Maybe it affects interactions between colleagues.
Just was wondering: in your experience, if Racial Imposter Syndrome plays a role in the workplace, what you’ve seen in your experience, and how people have addressed it?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah. That’s a good question and you know, there are a lot of individuals who can speak on this.
I am very, very, very fortunate in my life, where I don’t experience this Imposter Syndrome in the workplace at all, nor did I really experience it in school. I did a little bit — and I mentioned it in my talk afterward — but not really, not to an extent, where I could really enlighten someone about it. I’ve been very lucky. In that race, ethnicity, culture has never come up in my workplace, whereas all of my jobs have always been around [the] quality of work, work ethic, and if you know how to do your job or not.
Diamond Rypka: So, I’ve been very, very lucky in my workplaces.
Steven Chan: That is awesome! So, you know, there’s a lot of people out there who would love to hear these stories.
And so wonderful that you’re sharing them, being authentic in The Asian Tales podcast, and also sharing other people’s too.
If you could have a message that listeners could take away, what kind of messages, would you like your listeners to take away after hearing The Asian Tales podcast?
Diamond Rypka: This is a great question, because I do the same thing on my podcast as well. [With] all of my guests on the show, I want them to give a message to, basically, a younger version of themselves, or a different version of themselves, and I want to know what they want to say as well. For me, if I could give a message to, let’s say, high school me … that regardless of age, you don’t have to be a teenager, you can be a young adult and adult, a child, whoever. Someone who’s feeling that.
I would say it’s really important to, one, share these feelings with someone. And two, something that Silvia Wakana said was to not feel ashamed to ask questions to people, if you want to get involved.
Because, oftentimes, people who are like me who were born in the States or Western country and are half an Asian ethnicity, feel like they are not worthy enough of experiencing these cultures.
Especially if you don’t speak the language well.
I don’t speak the language, I don’t understand these traditions, I don’t understand the food. [But] it’s who you are. And we’re an interesting category. We’re not, we’re not ethnically this? Excuse me, sorry. We don’t partake in all of these traditions, however, that is who we are ethnically. We are half. My mom is full Japanese. She’s a very adorable little Japanese woman. My grandparents are full Japanese. I used to sit and watch her drink tea and cheekily pull up daikon radishes from her garden and she’d yell at me and go, “Nanda, you little monkey!”
Things that you don’t realize — it’s different. You’re your own person, you don’t have to fit into a certain category, and if you want to learn more about who your grandparents were, who your mom was, who you could be or who you are, who you want to be. You can, there’s no shame in that and there’s no shame in asking questions at all.
And someone who’s shaming you for asking questions? Maybe have a conversation with them. See why they feel that way.
What’s next in store with Diamond Rypka’s The Asian Tales podcast?
Steven Chan: I love how you feel so comfortable with who you are and how you are expressing the message to people, “Hey, it’s fine to be you.” “It’s okay to be you.”
So, a couple of things I’m thinking about. For you: in the future. Your podcast future, and you, yourself, any journeys you’re looking forward to? The first question is: what’s next in store with The Asian Tales podcast?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah. So for now, it is a very casual podcast I do not want it to be anything fancy. You don’t need to come in, you don’t need to dress up for it. I was doing video portions, but then I changed it to audio, because I don’t want you to care about what you look like, and how your how you’re sounding, or anything like that. I want you to just have a conversation. Don’t worry about if you stutter over something, not a big deal, you know, it’s comfortable. I want you to share your tale. So for now, it’s just very casual and calm, kind of like that, but I hope in the future that I could interview.
More people that talk about their culture, as in: I really want to talk to people who will share myths and legends, or I really want to talk to people who will explain certain food dishes or things like this, because not only is it your personal experience, it’s a great opportunity to educate people that want to connect more with their culture. For example, I really wanted to learn more about Japanese culture, maybe people of Vietnamese descent, want to learn more about Vietnamese culture, or Chinese, etc, whatever. Korean.
You know so in the future, I really want to bring on more educational topics that maybe some people are still too scared to ask others about. For example, I’m not scared to ask it:
“What is the difference between a yukata and a kimono? When do I wear which one? Why? I don’t know, is it the material? Is it for seasons?”
I have no idea, but I would love to talk to someone about that and have them educate me on it. That’s absolutely 100% something that I want in the future, something for people to learn from.
Steven Chan: And so far, I’m hearing you’ve conquered three continents so far, right? North America, Asia, Australia. What other continents do you have in store for you in the future?
Diamond Rypka: Well, living-wise, I probably won’t move anywhere again. It’s very difficult… I’m just going to throw my dog into this podcast because I love him so much. He’s moved with me with all three places, he’s lived with me in the States, he’s lived with me in China, and he now lives with me in Australia right now. He’s too old to keep traveling, so I don’t think that he’ll come with me anywhere else, and I don’t think that I’ll really live in a new country.
However, I do love traveling and I’ve been to a lot of places not just China, Australia, and the US, but I’ve been to loads of places. I’ve gone through Europe, I wouldn’t mind going back through Europe, but I really oh! Duh?! I haven’t been to Japan.
Steven Chan: Oh, my goodness.
Diamond Rypka: It’s on my list of places to go.
A Message From a Miss Asian Global & America 2020 Candidate — Diamond Rypka
Steven Chan: Well, hoping that travel opens up certainly in the future. We wanted to end with any messages you want to give to our viewers and listeners. Is there anything that you’d like to say? Any messages? Any things that you’d like them to come away with?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah. Absolutely, and I think it’s the same message. My same personal message that I gave earlier is: really, don’t be afraid to be yourself and don’t be afraid to ask questions. I think one of the number one fears that people have that they might not even realize it is they’re too scared to ask questions.
Whether it’s a simple question, complex question, a question that they don’t even know that they have but they’re trying to form in their head, on the fly on the go. It’s okay just ask questions, and I think Imagine Talks is really cool because it invites a bunch of people of different backgrounds to share their tales as well, and a message of some sort…
And I think that any one of the people you see on Imagine Talks on the podcast is all really friendly, too and I would encourage you to reach out and ask them questions, too. If you connect with any of their messages that they have. Because I would want to encourage anyone listening to my show to do the same.
Reach out. Ask those questions. You feel inspired? Tell them that.
You know all of the good stuff. Don’t be afraid to ask a question.
Steven Chan: Thank you so so much for that. Diamond, if people want to get in touch with you, or to view your Instagram or other social media. Where can they find you?
Diamond Rypka: Yeah, I am very active on Instagram. at Instagram. Oh, sorry. Not at Instagram. @DiamondRypka D-I-A-M-O-N-D-R-Y-P-K-A.
Diamond Rypka: I answer questions on there all the time, as well as if you ever listen to my podcast and you have questions there, or you want to be involved in the bonus mini-episodes which I invite you to go check out. You can always message me on my Instagram through that. If you want to check out the actual podcast. I am streaming it on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Anchor Podcasts. There’s a lot of places. Just Google The Asian Tales podcast and you’ll find one somewhere.
Steven Chan: That’s awesome! We definitely will check it out. Thank you so much for being with us, Diamond.
Diamond Rypka: Yeah. Thank you so much for having me.
Steven Chan: Thank you for joining us for this episode with Diamond Rypka! You can view Diamond’s talk on Youtube by searching for The Imagine Talks channel.
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