What Changes When We Grow Up?

fotedar moksha
Mr. Plan ₿ Publication
4 min readAug 17, 2024

Growing up isn’t just about getting taller, going to college, or landing that first job or that is what I thought. What is it then? It is a subtle metamorphosis – a shift in our inner world that happens quietly, almost unnoticeably, until one day, we realize we’re not who we used to be. What changes when we grow up isn’t just a question of responsibility or independence; it’s about the transformation of how we experience life, how we see ourselves, and how we interpret the world around us.

From Infinite Time to Passing Moments

Remember when summer felt like a lifetime? When a week could stretch on forever, and waiting for your birthday felt like an eternity? As children, time seemed endless, a vast ocean of days and nights with no clear horizon. But as we grow, time thickens. Hours become precious, days slip through our fingers, and the future scurries toward us with an alarming speed. We learn that time is the most finite resource, a currency we can never earn back, and this realization changes everything – how we prioritize, how we make decisions, and how we live.

The Evolution of Fear

As children, our fears are simple: the dark, monsters under the bed, or getting lost in a crowd. These fears are tangible, and often, a comforting word or a nightlight can chase them away. But as we grow, our fears grow as well. They become more abstract, more deeply rooted. We’re no longer afraid of the dark but of what the darkness represents – failure, loneliness, the unknown. These are fears that a light switch can’t banish, fears that require us to confront uncomfortable truths about ourselves and the world.

The Redefinition of Success

When we’re young, success is often defined for us: good grades, praise from teachers, winning the big game. But as we grow, success becomes a far more elusive concept. It’s no longer about external validation but an internal journey. Success becomes personal – finding fulfilment in our work, nurturing meaningful relationships, or simply being at peace with who we are. We start to understand that success isn’t a destination but a continuously evolving process, and it’s different for everyone.

The Shifting Role of Identity

As children, our identities stood often shaped by those around us – parents, teachers, friends. We are who they tell us we are, absorbing labels and roles like sponges. But as we grow, the responsibility of defining who we are falls squarely on our shoulders. We begin to challenge the narratives we’ve been given and start crafting our own. This can be both liberating and terrifying, as we realize that our identity is not fixed but fluid, constantly shifting with our experiences, choices, and beliefs.

The Complexity of Truth

Children see the world in black and white, good and bad, right and wrong. But as we grow, we discover the grey areas. We learn that truth is not always absolute and that it can be subjective, shaped by perspective, context, and experience. This complexity can be disorienting, but it also deepens our understanding of the world. We become more empathetic, and more open-minded, as we realize that everyone is living their own version of the truth.

The Price of Independence

Growing up is often synonymous with gaining independence, but what we don’t realize is that independence comes at a price. It’s not just about freedom; it’s about the weight of making our own choices and bearing the consequences. We move from the safety of relying on others to the vulnerability of relying on ourselves. This shift introduces us to resilience and, furthermore, brings a sense of isolation as we navigate the complexities of life on our own terms.

The Quieting of Dreams

As children, we dream with abandon. Our dreams are big, bold, and unencumbered by reality. But as we grow, those dreams often quiet down, tempered by practicality and experience. We learn that not every dream will come true and that some dreams need to be adjusted or even let go. But growing up also teaches us the value of perseverance. The dreams that endure the test of time are the ones we truly cherish, and they become even more meaningful because of the journey we’ve taken to keep them alive.

The Subtle Art of Growing Up

Growing up isn’t a single moment or event; it’s a series of small changes that accumulate over time. It’s the process of learning to navigate the world with a deeper understanding, finding beauty in complexity, and crafting a life that feels authentic to who we are becoming. The magic of childhood doesn’t disappear; it simply transforms, adopting new forms that we can only appreciate with the learning that comes from growing up. We learn that change is the only constant, and in embracing that change, we find our true selves.

Thanks for sticking around! If you enjoyed this little dive, don’t forget to hit that follow button for more quirky food for thought. Until then, keep those curious minds hungry!

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fotedar moksha
Mr. Plan ₿ Publication

welcome to my medium, where I explore topics that intrigue me and resonate with everyday life. connect with me on LinkedIn for queries or collab @moksha fotedar