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Lesbian First. Then (Maybe) Trans
Yes, labels can matter
Originally published in Prism & Pen 16-06-21. So it’s a Pride month piece. But then shouldn’t every month be Pride month?!
Recently Prism & Pen (re)published a piece of mine titled 'Woman First. Trans second.' This is its sequel, if you will.
When I wrote that piece it was important for me to set that order because being trans is only a part of the woman I am. And being a woman is way more than just being trans. But it’s true for most trans people that the enormity of the realisation takes over for a time. Some never get past it, and will forever foreground their transness. Some seek to hide in perpetuity, living ‘stealth’. But for most of us there’s a pattern.
Being trans, for a time is kinda ALL we are. I mean, our entire lives are usually turned upside down. So it’s kinda understandable. Then we become more comfortable in our proper gender (or lack thereof). And then being trans is far less important and we settle more fully into our so-called ‘acquired gender’.
I certainly followed this pattern. Possibly a little quicker than some. I was only eight months into medical transition when I started to think I wanted to background my transness. Not to hide it. I’ll never do that. And I can’t ever give up the fight for the rights of such a…