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This is an email from MuddyUm's The Real Dirt, a newsletter by MuddyUm.

Writers Life Humor Vol 3

How do we do the do that we do when we do what we do

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Writers are the most diverse group you can hang out with and still be yourself. Understanding every person has their own writing routine is part of the fun. Of course, every writer has an opinion about every other writer’s routine.

One of our writers goes swimming in an icy lake most days, no — no — no. I don’t foresee many writers swimming beside her in the early morning light.

Another of my friends has an enormous dog. He has trained his canine in agility and runs the dog through his paces before starting any project. I dissuaded my friend from training his pet to hunt writers. I said most would probably be tough and stringy. He agreed with me.

He physically sprints and jumps to get inspiration. No — no — no, again. Most writers are not running anywhere.

I sit and stare at my pool cleaner and hummingbirds to get inspiration, sometimes drinking an alcoholic drink with two purring cats lying next to me. I could entice some writers to join me in my drinking and cat-petting routine.

Below are some writers' thoughts about writers. Enjoy.

I’ve Just Been Added As A MuddyUM Humor Writer The Fools by Clif Haley

Writer’s Block Is Part of a Vast Global Conspiracy by Christopher Massimine

I am a brand new writer and I am very, very good at critiquing other writers by Amy Strommer

Dog Bites Man by Andrew Rodwin

A day in the life of a writer

Don’t Drunk Dial Your Posts by Amy Sea

Edit with a sober mind

Eleven Mistakes Every Writer Makes by Rachael Ann Sand

MuddyUm brand art by David Todd McCarty

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Toni Crowe

Toni Crowe


Sarcastic escaped executive. Best-selling author of six books. Writes whatever she wants. Engineer. Owner: No Air. Editor, MuddyUm.