17: Let’s Talk about Billy Joel.
I defend an old, wealthy punching bag in 16 panels.
Some of the Bullshitty Reviews mentioned in the comic:
Fringe Underground is a nothing site — just a posturing fakepunk magazine. But their Ten Reasons Why Billy Joel Sucks needs to be seen. Of the ten reasons given, two are musical. He’s ugly, they say. He wasn’t punk, they say. They actually paint an L on his forehead, so you don’t misunderstand their critical position. The piece is silly.
The strangest thing about both the Fringe U piece and the insane Billy Joel is Donald Trump piece is that both hate Joel for not being specifically someone else.
“In 1972, when the New York Dolls, Lou Reed, Iggy Pop and David Bowie were reinventing the musical wheel on a daily basis, Billy Joel arrived with his dopey, obvious debut, Cold Spring Harbor.”
In Tablet Mag — a Jews for Trump publication not worth any time, either — made this bolder and stupider claim:
“American Jews used to live just enough on the fringes of culture and when they butted in they sounded like Lenny Bruce or Saul Bellow or Lou Reed or Gilda Radner or Joey Ramone. Now they’re more likely to sound like Billy Joel.”
Somebody explain to me how that isn’t insane. Liebovitz also claims that other boomer acts who tour as elders “still have the spark,” whereas Joel doesn’t. She cites Paul McCartney. I’ve seen McCartney as an elder (my in-comic claim that I would never attend an old man’s rock concert should have said “again”) and it was as whitebread-tame and un-rocking as any Jukebox Musical. It was radically uninteresting. I hear people say Springsteen can still rock a stadium, but… I don’t believe it enough to wager 200 bucks and an evening.
Even the nice articles about BJ are kind of mean. Hit Parade, the fantastic podcast about chart history I’ve mentioned before, refuses to back off the “he’s a magpie” line even when it’s super-weak, and is grudging with every compliment in a way that isn’t explained. Vice has A Defense of Billy Joel, but it was in their “Stupid” issue. Go figure.
25 Solid, Impressive Billy Joel Songs
I made you a playlist. I’m not trying to convince anyone to love this music — but I dare anyone to try and explain why any of this is “awful.” Whether you take the dare is up to you, baby. (I’ve left off songs I think are good but have the over-familiarity problem. If you note it, you’re correct that a large number of these are from Songs in the Attic, a live compilation of songs poorly recorded in-studio. That album’s amazing.)
Here’s the link if the embedded playlist isn’t showing up.
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Peace out -
jep
