58: 1985

Which was the worst year for music? (It was 1985)

Here’s something that makes me feel old AF: when I took this job in 1985, I earned $2.90 an hour, which was the special minimum wage for 15 year olds. I turned 16 and got bumped to $3.10.

With this money, I bought records. I think 45s were like 2.50, and LPs were ten bucks, more or less. I’ve confessed before that at that time, these were more than likely wretched records by Night Ranger and Rainbow and Styx.

Terrible, Terrible Music from 1985

I was trying to recall the music of 1985 — the music I was familiar with then, anyway — and consulted some lists, and was surprised to find my stomach aching at the 85 and 86 Billboard lists. They were not fun years, but I didn’t realize I’d have such a visceral reaction to the songs! Of the hundred songs listed on the Billboard Top 1985 list, there are maybe 7 songs that I don’t hate deeply — all that movie soundtrack stuff, all that Miami Vice music — uggh.

I can’t tell if it was the time of life (this was the period of my parents’ divorce etc) or the time of music. I wonder how others see that year. 1986–1989 were pretty awful music years too, in my opinion, but I was not following charts by then, and rather finding my own musical path. It’s probably impossible to be objective about one’s teen years (and what for?) but it’s interesting to me that I resonate nicely with plenty of 1980–1984 chart music and am repulsed by what came right after.

Music by Genesis, Eddie Money, Huey Lewis, the Cars all have hard dividing lines at the decade’s middle: I dug (dig) Abacab and Mama, but Invisible Touch? I loved Shakin and Baby Hold On, and hate Take Me Home Tonight. The Cars rocked until that awful Uh Oh It’s Magic stuff. We Built This City is possibly the worst rock song of all time — 1985. Billy Ocean’s oeuvre was just as bad. A lot of long-touring American rock bands figured out Journey’s lucrative trick and released dreadful power ballads (that topped the charts). Sting and Phil Collins were slathered all over every goddam record that came out (except for music from the hit factory known as Prince). This was the year of We Are the World. I hate the sound of this year. I’m sure this isn’t objective truth — but what is so different? Is it just my ears?

Incredible Music from 1985

Anyway — this wasn’t the end of my music love (obviously) — just the end of my involvement with the radio and pop culture’s mainstream. Outside of Top Pop stuff, wonderful things were happening — Kate Bush was on top of her game. Tom Waits was in his second Golden Age. The Smiths and The Cure were making great music; REM and the Replacements were up and running — I just hadn’t heard about or delved into any of it yet. I would discover that all shortly, when I discovered the Alternative stance and the word-of-mouth recommendation scene that would rejuvenate my love for music after this nadir.

That’s all for now, fellow babies. Hope you’re feeling the Spring in the air and spending some time outside in nature. If you like this, please share it with somebody.

peace out

jep

NEWS: We met the lovely people at Sour Cherry Comics in San Francisco this week, and you can now purchase my last printed book, How About A Nice Big Cup of Climate Grief? there! San Francisco has more book and comic stores than anywhere I’ve seen in years. It’s a great city, in general. If you’re there, go buy my book. :)