Musings of a Working Mum: Serenity
Just the other day, a scene from a TV show reminded me of the Serenity Prayer, and it struck me how versatile and apt those few words are. On further reflection, I better understand why so many recovery programs have adopted the prayer and why it stood the test of time.
In a world reeling from the impact of the COVID-19 pandemic, the concept of being ‘serene’ for many will seem almost impossible to fathom. I don’t know about you, but being a great mum while working full time and managing all the other hats we have seemed complicated enough before the enforced lockdown kicked in. However, thrive, we must in these times, and like many, I have had to look inwards to move forwards.
I always thought it would be great if I could spend a bit more time with my kids, worried that between work, school and extracurricular activities I was missing out on crucial elements of my kids’ development. I love my job and see the merit in what I do, but like many working mums, I have had to work hard to ensure that the work/life scales balanced out in a meaningful way. The enforced lockdown brings with it a degree of uncertainty and will have impacted different family units and individuals in different ways. I, for one very quickly realised “you must be careful what you wish for !!”.
The first few weeks took some juggling, and as a family, we muddled through as best as we could, but I wouldn’t say that in the early days we did much thriving, if anything we probably just survived. Between the shock of the situation, the panic buying (don’t even get me started on that), immediate and enforced homeschooling and blanket home working, mentally it felt like I was in a war zone with a hundred and one things thrown continuously at me. Now, that level of stress and uncertainty is unsustainable, and that’s where the serenity prayer comes in. I can’t say that I consciously modelled the prayer (or that my home is now fully zen ), but on reflection, we have pulled through because we found a place of calmness.
The calmness we have achieved, came with accepting that there are things I cannot control (nor re-create), for one thing, schools closing is out of my hands and with the best will in the world I cannot re-create school in my home (a shout out to all educators, you are saints!!).
That said, simply saying I’m not cut out to be a teacher is not good enough. My kids still need to learn and develop and grow, so I have had to step up and step out of my comfort zone (ok, to be honest, I have relied a lot more on my husband’s teaching skills which by far supersedes mine!). Working from home for me was always characterised by blissful silence and single-minded focus, no interruptions nor distractions. Now I share the study with a husband and two kids and let’s just say I have had to embrace a new way of working!
There is much to which we working mums need to adapt. This current global crisis has forced many of us to confront some harsh realities. Chiefly, that we cannot do it all, that life is precious, and success is in many ways relative. I am committed to coming out of this crisis with a healthier understanding of attaining work/life balance, and I truly believe the principles enshrined in the Serenity prayer will help me get there. To this end, I must grow in wisdom, i.e. I must grow in the application of knowledge which translates to; being clear on what things are outside my control and choosing to push the boundaries of my personal ‘limitations’ to be more than I ever thought possible!
As the Easter holidays draw to a close and the new school term kicks off from my home to yours, here’s to finding serenity amid the noise and coming out stronger and wiser.
Ladies, we’ve got this!
