Day 2: Impacting Someone Else’s Tomorrow
April 2
The Ripple Effect: One Small Change Can Have An Enormous Impact
Impact.
We want to make a difference — and we do — sometimes without even realizing it.
Drew Dudley’s TED Talk is easily one of my favorites. His words resonate with me and I believe they have helped to push my thinking about impact. When I started to ponder today’s prompt, thinking about my impact, I knew that Dudley was spot on. It felt a little bit arrogant to count the ways that I may have made a difference and celebrate that. How true it is that we often don’t allow ourselves to take credit for our impact — we don’t allow ourselves to feel good about it. Today was no different. So, instead of thinking about the lollipop moments for which I may have been the catalyst, I began, instead, to think about a few powerful lollipop moments that were created for me.
Last year was a tough year.
As I fumbled, floundered, and “failed forward” through my first year of AP Psychology I had some pretty severe critics — both students and their parents. Living and working in this environment every day took a toll on me. By May I was well on my way to broken. I felt as if my critics had, in fact, reached critical mass. It seemed that nothing I did was good enough, effective enough, rigorous enough, easy enough, soon enough, thorough enough — you get the picture. If I did 10 things to help my students learn and grow, there was always that 11th thing that I could have done. On the same day that I encouraged my very first group of AP Psychology test-takers — handing out snacks and hand-written letters to each student, enthusiastically marching with them to their testing room to the tune of “We are the Champions,” fighting fears, and calming nerves — I left school in tears after a particularly distasteful meeting with my principal and superintendent, in response to a particularly viscous missive they received from just one parent. I was a leader — an experienced educator. I had worked harder in this year than I had ever worked before, but none of that mattered. The words of this one parent cut like knives. It didn’t matter that I knew deep down it wasn’t true — I felt incompetent. I wasn’t sure if she wanted my class, my job, or my spirit. I was ready to give up, to wave the white flag, to surrender.
I did what every over-worked, stressed, one-click-away-from-a-breakdown teacher would do on the eve of her birthday . . . I drove directly to the nail salon for some much needed pampering! Somewhere in the middle of my pedicure I heard the familiar ding of my email. It was ANOTHER parent email. In that moment, when I just couldn’t take another hit, I noticed something different about this email. This email was from a respected educational leader in our community and, arguably, THE most respected parent in our district. It read,
Hi Ms. Hollenbach, I remember attending back to school night in your classroom when you shared both excitement and anxiety about taking on the AP Psychology class. A few minutes into your presentation, I could sense your excitement, your commitment to preparation, and your overall positive approach and outlook for the school year. Each week, Colin would come home talking about what he had learned, and just as importantly, how positive and encouraging you have been with him and the entire class. I read the card this evening that you wrote to Colin prior to the exam. I can’t think of any better motivation for a student to walk into a stressful AP exam. The fact that you took the time to write a personalized note of encouragement is a true testament to your commitment to their success. Your words of encouragement were genuine and incredibly impactful.
Please know he has really enjoyed your class, and please know we greatly appreciate your willingness to personally connect with your students, and Colin in particular. It truly makes a difference
Wow. Perfect timing. In this moment this email was exactly what I needed. I read it over and over again. I think may have been in shock. And then. . . a Facebook alert. This is what I saw . . .
As I sat with my feet in the pedicure bowl overwhelmed, this time tears of joy uncontrollably streaming down my face, somehow the tragedy that was my day, and sometimes my year, didn’t matter . You see, Katja was a very sassy student. Oh, did she have attitude! And some days I was sure that I gave it back to her as good as she dished it out. I genuinely loved Katja’s spunk but somehow I was sure that Katja was not one of my biggest fans. How wrong I was! Know that Katja is nothing if she is not REAL. She doesn’t give false compliments. She says what she means, and, on this day, what she said meant so much.
The next day I knew that my superintendent would be holding interviews with some of those critics I mentioned earlier. What I didn’t know was that I would be met this day with flowers and an encouraging note from a colleague (and parent of one of my students) and that another group of my students, jumping to my defense, requested an audience with the superintendent to offer their own version of what my classroom was like for them. As the day rolled on it was business as usual for me; however, the sweetest thing happened. I had some visitors (including Colin). These kids had no idea if I knew what was going on and they were coming by my classroom, one after another, to check on me. It made my heart smile and I knew I had to keep on going.
Almost serendipitously, a few days later, another parent, who had asked me to spend some extra time with his daughter to talk about “real life” after high school, sent me this video:
I won’t ruin it for you if you haven’t seen it, but I assure you it is powerful. I was not sure if I was a sugar cookie, if I was fighting sharks, or swimming in the dark . . . but this served as one more reminder that ringing the bell is not an option. It seems that the messages we need have a way of finding us!
In closing his talk, Dudley leaves us with a call to action. He challenges us not only to create lollipop moments, but to acknowledge them when they happen, to pay them forward, and to say thank you. I accept that challenge and I hope you will too.
In a system where students often feel powerless and without voice, I tell you that they are powerful beyond measure. We spend a lot of time talking about how we can make a difference for our kids but how often do we stop to consider the difference that they make for each of us?
Ironically, it was in acknowledging my impact that my students and their parents had a profound impact on me.
Today I acknowledge that Colin and Katja, along with many of my amazing students and their parents, were the catalyst for lollipop moments for me that have fundamentally made my life better. You may not have realized it at the time, but your words and actions meant more to me than I can possibly express. When I was drowning in the negative, you created a positive ripple that reminded me to just keep swimming. You inspired me to shake it off, to pick myself up, and use what I learned from this experience to be better for my students. You made an impact and I thank you!
In case you were wondering . . .
This year has been nothing short of AMAZING!
Believe it or not — Colin is still in touch . . . and still a catalyst for the occasional lollipop moment!
I just wanted to thank you again for everything you did for me. It is very rare to have invested teachers, and those who are, never get the appreciation they deserve.
