My Mom Was Dying, and Nobody Told Me
by Brennan C. Wood and Darcy Walker Krause
Sitting in my office on Valentine’s Day, my Facebook pinged with someone tagging me to a post. The post contained a link to Jon Mehlman’s powerful and loving tribute to his wife, Marla, in The Atlantic titled, “My Wife Was Dying, and We Didn’t Tell Our Children.” Mr. Mehlman shares how he and his wife decided to withhold her terminal diagnosis from their children to shield them from the pain of her, ultimately fatal, cancer. As I read this story, the 12-year-old in me wished I could talk to Mr. Mehlman and share my experience.
It was the night of my 12th birthday. I walked into our living room to find my Grandmother and my Great Uncle Joe sitting in the dark talking in hushed tones. My Grandmother’s brother was a highly regarded doctor who lived halfway across the country. He was in our home for a very rare visit. I vividly remember the uneasiness I felt in the pit of my stomach, knowing that I walked in on an important conversation. Joe looked me right in the eye, and he said in a kind tone, “Brennan, your mom is going to die.” In a state of shock, I yelled back at him, “No she is not! You are wrong!” as I ran out of the room. Three days later, my mom died.
My mom, Doris, was only 36 years old. My dad, Frank, was only 38. They had three kids and a successful business. They had been in…
