Folks who Choose to be Alone
It’s more common than you think
I live in that solitude which is painful in youth, but delicious in the years of maturity.” — Albert Einstein
Recently I had a therapy session with a client who perseverated over her longing to be surrounded by a vast circle of friends who would consistently invite her to parties and initiate inspiring activities. Although she has more than a handful of ostensibly satisfying friendships in her life, her craving for greater social interaction than she already has revealed a subjective experience of loneliness.
Accompanying her fixation on bountiful camaraderie was a fear and disapproval of those who are either involuntarily bereft of human contact or choose to spend time alone. In fact, she implied that those devoid of a social network, who are unpopular and lead solitary lives, are basically pathetic losers.
Such pejorative judgments are common. Those who lead relatively solitary lives are routinely construed as having some sort of mental health condition or a social disorder. It’s typical to make sweeping assumptions that betrayal, rejection, or trauma in relationships accounts for why one would choose to retreat from others. Similarly, it’s often surmised that experiences with autism, bullying or abuse contribute to issues with trust or social anxiety, thus…
