I’m Tired Of Seeing How Awful I Look In The Mirror

Melissa Smith
Jul 22, 2017 · 2 min read

June 20 — I forced myself up this morning. It was hard but I can’t keep up these graveyard hours. While brushing my teeth and looking into the mirror it was rough seeing how awful I look. I almost didn’t recognize myself. There’s only so much I can do about my hair without a curling iron. What I can do is put on makeup.

A simple task. Not so simple when you are crying. I don’t want to cry. They are silent tears and I simply keep brushing them away. It took me a while but I did it and I really do feel better. I feel more like myself. Considering how I worked I must have.

I ended up putting in 18 hours today without a lot of sleep. There wasn’t a struggle and I even felt like I was working at a faster pace — my normal pace. My day was familiar and filled with interviews, reading, writing, emails, phone calls. Everything I know how to do well. It felt good to work like me. It also felt good to buy food for dinner at a normal time. What I would give for chips and salsa right now. Some kind of comfort food instead of glutenous.

Being more aware today than I have been I noticed how much pot stuff is everywhere. It’s in the drinks and even in the chocolate bars. At least there are pictures of it on a lot of things. In one alcoholic drink it looked like there were plant leaves. It was on the label and called White Widow. I don’t dare even touch anything. If it doesn’t contain pot I don’t understand why it would have the leaf on the front. Weird.

The day went on and I felt really good about work. I must have because even after 18 hours I was still wanting to work. If I’m going to try and get myself back on schedule I need to go to bed. Hopefully, I’m back to my normal badass self.

My end of day gratitude:

  1. Besides this morning I didn’t cry.
  2. Being able to have a really great work day.
  3. Feeling like my work self again.

Support my travels.

My Year As A “Roamer”

The daily life of a human while working and living in 12 countries in 12 months in 2017.

Melissa Smith

Written by

World traveler. Virtual Assistant Matchmaker. Remote Work Consultant. Entrepreneur. Bestselling Author. Mother. Sister. Daughter. Human. Everybody is somebody.

My Year As A “Roamer”

The daily life of a human while working and living in 12 countries in 12 months in 2017.

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