Taylor Swift’s “Reputation” Review

As much as we all love to hate on Taylor Swift, there’s no denying her music is good, and really fucking catchy. Almost too catchy. As a low key die-hard T-Swift stan I may be biased in writing this article, but there’s a reason she sold over 800,000 copies in the first hour ok people. It was arguably the most anticipated album of the year as a response to the #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty and all the middle school drama that surrounds her. The album has so many good songs it’s hard to talk shit about it but that’s my job so alas…

Ready for it:

Love this song because it’s a banger and gets you hype for the rest of the album. Yes, Taylor, we are ready for it and have been for the past 2 years. Thank god you came out of hiding with your cats.

End Game:

A match made in auto-tune heaven- Taylor Swift, Future and Ed Sheeran were never artists I thought I would say in the same sentence but after seeing that GAP ad with Future and Cher (add link or photo below of cher & future) I think he’s doing anything rn for coin. The song overall is catchy enough that it works, but Ed Sheeran’s pseudo rap makes me cringe. Also, Ed Sheeran sounds like he’s trying to sing over T-Swift when she uses “his” term A-Team. Sit down, Ed. The song will def be a single though. My fave line is I swear I don’t love the drama, it loves me bc same girl, same.

I Did Something Bad:

I Did Something Bad is my favorite song on the album. The kind of song you play while you and your bestie are keying your ex boyfriends car. You know, the regular.

This song should’ve been her first single off the album instead of horrible Look What You Made Me Do because she actually takes ownership in this song for being a psycho bitch (not her usual damsel in distress victim bullshit) and I love that. V unapologetic.

Don’t Blame me:

Don’t Blame me sounds almost exactly like Take Me To Church by Hozier. Like it’s almost if Hozier and Taylor pulled the “yea you can copy my homework but change it up a little” kinda bullshit we used to get away with throughout the entirety of our academic careers. Like us, Taylor gets away with it too because it’s such a catchy song.

Delicate:

Ok the autotune on this one is so strong here, I almost can barely tell it’s Taylor. It sounds more like Imogen Heap. Not really feeling this one tbh. Sounds like it should be a theme song for a shitty reality show.

Look What You Made Me do:

I skipped this song because I physically can’t bring myself to hear it again. Enough said.

So It Goes:

So It Goes is literally SO boring. Most unmemorable song on the album. P sure this is just a filler song. Literally almost fell asleep listening to it, so it goes…

Gorgeous:

Gorgeous is another one i’m not that into. It sounds like it was written by a stage 5 clinger, which I mean I’m p sure Taylor actually is but it’s veerrrry evident here.

Getaway Car:

Getaway Car is my second fave song on the album. Style who?? She can’t come to the phone right now. V into the message of the song also which is basically that starting a relationship while one isn’t finished isn’t going to end well. The Bonnie and Clyde imagery is amazing and all I ever needed in life was a music video to this song.

King Of My Heart:

Taylor confuses me with this song. She starts off saying she’s happy being single and alone, but then the rest of the song is about how someone is the ‘king of her heart’? Bitch, make up your mind. Musically, the song is confusing as well- it changes moods more than I do. Also, it bothers me how she pronounces “jaguar” in this song. Meh.

Dancing With Our Hands Tied:

Dancing With Our Hands Tied reminds me of a Chainsmokers song. Catchy and will probably be everyone's guilty pleasure.

Dress:

Dress is not a pleasant song for me because it makes me think of Taylor Swift having sex which is offensive to say the least. Can you imagine the weird horse girl awkwardness? Also, it’s suggested the “i don’t want you like a best friend” part is about her wanting to get it with Ed Sheeran. I’m sorry for making you picture T-Swift and Ed Sheeran have sex. Deeply, truly, sorry.

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things:

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things sounds like Avril Lavigne after she came back from her punk days as a pop princess and people thought she was kidnapped. The song attempts to be an angsty jab directed at Katy Perry but sounds like it was written for a 5 year old. You didn’t win this playground fight, Taylor.

Call It What You Want:

Call It What You Want seems like Taylor is trying to project the idea that she’s happy on all of us. Like you know when a girl breaks up with a guy and she posts Instagram photos of her having the best time ever? That’s what this song is except Taylor broke up with the world for a while.

New Years Day:

New Years Day makes me feel nostalgic and miss the old T-Swift a little. Def into this as a hangover anthem.

Overall, you can try to hate her, but these songs are bound to get stuck in your head. Jokes on us. Her songs are on our #TaylorSwiftIsOverParty playlist.