Review of Maryann Schafer’s “Why the 2003 Iraqi War Vote Matters in 2016 Lite/Part 2”

Thoroughness and comprehension: ✔️

Stretching of creative muscles: ➕

Using the right tools for the job: ➕

mschaefer, I loved the creative and meta approach of placing an article inside an article while bending space and time. I’ve never seen this approach before and it works here.

While Medium is still a casual method of expressing yourself online, I’d still recommend exercising those editing muscles. Double check on things like sentence structure, formalizing thoughts, and avoiding run-on sentences.

Proof reading marks [in square brackets]

It is important to watch these videos if you can, and understand that the two Democratic candidates, Hillary Clinton and Bernie[.] I can’t make this subject light. I can’t make it funny. I can’t make it less frightening. [The candidates] stood in the same place, at the same time, with the same information, and the same things at stake.

Since this is a politically charged persuasive piece, might I suggest a stronger call to action? Perhaps when you recommend for your reader to vote Bernie Sanders at the end, you make that piece of text bolded and have it link to his website or donation page?