2 Books That Recently Changed My Life

It’s not often that a book completely changes my life. The last time this happened (until just recently) was last year when I read Atomic Habits by James Clear (a fantastic book on changing and designing your habits).

But right now I have two books that have changed my life in the last month. So I decided to tell you about them in case they can help you.

Be warned-the links I provide are affiliate links and may make me extremely wealthy. If you buy the books through them, I will earn a small commission although it won’t cost you any extra.

And for full transparency, I haven’t finished either book yet. But I’ve read a substantial amount from each and expect to complete them soon.

The advice has already helped my life significantly. I’d feel guilty not telling you about my experiences in case you’re in a spot where one of these books can change your life too.

Alright, let me explain how they’ve changed my life:

Book 1: Crucial Conversations

Link to book: Crucial Conversations

My wife brought this book home from work one day (they were giving them out to employees) and gave it to me knowing my interest in people skills. I put it away years ago and forgot about it until a couple of weeks ago.

After reading the first chapter I understood why 4 million copies have been sold. They manage to break down emotional and difficult conversations in a way I never thought possible.

The entire goal of the book is to help you navigate “crucial conversations”, which are conversations that involve:

The topic of the conversation doesn’t have to be important, but the potential outcome does.

For example, my wife and I could be arguing about who washed the dishes last (not important), but if it turns into a verbal fight it could have a big impact on the quality of my life.

Most people believe there are only two options for tough situations:

• Hold your tongue — by not saying anything you won’t upset the other person
• Upset the other person — you bring it up even though you know it will create more tension

But there’s a third option most people miss:

You can talk about the issue and work to resolve it without upsetting the other person.

You may think this isn’t possible (I know how you feel), but after reading this book you realize you can broach almost any subject with anyone you want.

One of the major points is that you want people to feel safe in the conversation. They should feel safe presenting information and adding to the dialogue.

If they think you’re going to dismiss what they say, interrupt them to push your point onto them, laugh at them, or do anything other than listen and take their thoughts seriously, they won’t feel safe.

This book presents clear ways to notice when this is happening, reflect on whether you’re making conversations safe or not, and tactics to help you do it better in the future.

And there’s so much more to the book beyond this.

I’m not kidding when I say this book has changed my life.

• I’m much clearer with clients
• I’ve had important conversations with my wife
• I don’t avoid people who frustrate me (I deal with it immediately)

And by doing these, I instantly sense the respect I get when I handle these conversations with comfort and grace.

I can only imagine the ROI these skills will have on my future.

Book 2: No B.S. Time Management for Entrepreneurs

Link to book: No B.S. Time Management for Entrepreneurs

I recently finished Dan Kennedy’s No B.S. Wealth Attraction in the New Economy and it was so good I decided to read another one of his books on Time Management (which he heavily promoted in No B.S Wealth Attraction).

I chose this book because I loved his work process. If I can get just a fraction of the productivity Dan does, I’ll get more done with less time.

It’s much more than your typical book on productivity. It teaches you a completely different way of living.

The biggest time sucks in our lives are other people. They email, text, or call us whenever they want and expect quick responses.

They knock on your door or pop in your cubicle whenever they want. And they’ll talk for as long as you let them.

If you don’t create boundaries and respect your time, neither will anyone else. This book reminds you of this often, and teaches you how to deal with these “time vampires”.

This book has helped me:

• Remove distractions
• Create boundaries with everyone I know
• Realize what work is important and what’s not

And it’s highly motivating.

Dan lights a fire under your ass to make you realize what you need to do. You learn how to distinguish between important and nonimportant work.

You learn how to truly value your time and make others do the same.

Now, I’m more productive, I’ve outsourced things I don’t like doing, and people rarely distract me.

If you want to design the life you want, there’s no better book.

If you want to take full ownership of your time and win back your day, this is a great book to read.

Originally published at https://robriker.com on March 9, 2021.