40 Days Off Dating
Yeah, I took a break from “love”
Day 1. This is awesome. I don’t have to make idle chit-chat over text. Or try to be witty. Or maintain mediocre conversations for days on end in case the second date ends up being great.
Day 5. Huh, the possibility of bringing a guy home was a really good motivator for cleaning my room.
Day 6. Oh my god, what about sex.
Day 8. Nah, it’s okay. I don’t really need sex.
Day 9. I mean, I probably need sex. But this is worth it. Because dating is exhausting and I need a break. Also I hate rejecting people, so if I date no people, I won’t have to dump anyone.
Day 11. This is great! I have so much free time now.
Day 15. I wish I was better at going to restaurants by myself. That I could just bring a book and not care that everyone around me was on dates or hanging out with friends.
Day 17. Who needs love when you have Pokemon Go?
Day 19. Holy shit, I need to get laid.
Day 20. I’m so bored. Thank god for Stranger Things.
Day 22. Fuck, I finished Stranger Things.
Day 23. Why is it so hard to make friends post-college? I feel like most of us are lonely and looking for company, but somehow, after you strike up a conversation with strangers, it never turns into anything.
Day 26. I really didn’t think through this no sex thing.
Day 27. Maybe I should get back on Tinder.
Day 28. But the thing is, I really don’t think I can handle any more disappointing outcomes.
Day 30. Not going on dates really helps save money.
Day 34. Wait. When did all my friends enter into serious, long-term relationships? How did I miss this? Oh my god, everyone’s getting engaged. I’m so behind on my timeline. When did this happen?
Shit, I wanted to have kids when I was 30. I can probably compact the whole marriage/engagement plan and meet someone like, next year, right? Or maybe in two years.
But what if I never meet anyone? What if I already fell in love once and that was it? How do we not sink under the infeasibility of falling in love again?
How do we even love people? How do we meet a person, and think, hey, that one? Like a flash, or over time? Because sometimes, I think I can convince myself of anything over time.
Day 37. Nah. This is fine. Timelines are stupid. Things will happen when they happen.
Day 40. Re-downloads Tinder.
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