this is how you lose her

You know something is wrong. Something doesn’t feel right, and you just assume the two of you are in a “rut”. So you don’t speak up, thinking it will pass — but she knows better.

She begins wondering why you don’t call before you go to bed, or why you’re barely replying to her texts. When she asks you what’s wrong, you spit out the same thing you’ve been saying for the past few weeks, like a broken record: “I’m just tired”. She doesn’t sleep that night. You don’t care.

She wonders why you haven’t asked to see her in days, or even weeks, so she pays you surprise visits and asks if she can bring you food. When she shows up at your door, wearing her biggest smile, you ask, “what are you doing here?” instead of giving her a kiss. You let her in, and fall asleep while she’s telling you about her day. She still stays, because at least she’s with you. The smile she always has on whenever she sees you disappears. You don’t notice.

When she tells you she misses you, and asks how your day was, you reply with “it was fine”, and don’t ask how her day was. She doesn’t reply, and thinks you need space. She wonders what she did wrong. You don’t ask.

She asks you to come over, so that the two of you can watch horror movies and cuddle all day, like you used to. You open up to her. She smiles because it’s the first time you’ve opened up to her in a long time. Suddenly, you say “I think we should stop seeing each other”. She feels her heart break. You walk out the door.


Girls like her love too hard. She loses herself in loving you, and blames herself when she doesn’t get the love she knows she deserves. Girls like her are always left to clean up the pieces of themselves that they left behind in their broken relationship, because they always hold on until the very end.

Girls like her are strong. Because even when you gave her every reason to leave, she stays — and even though you gave her every reason to doubt herself and question her self-worth, she knows she’s worth it. She knows that the love she has to give is incomparable.

Girls like her grow from the pain. Now, she stands up for herself when she knows she’s not being treated the way she should be. She wears her pain like armor, knowing now that she will never let someone who is unworthy of her, hurt her. She knows and acknowledges that she has made mistakes, but knows that her mistakes don’t make her who she is. She always forgave your mistakes, even when you weren’t sorry.

Girls like her move on quickly, because now she knows that she deserves someone who loves her just as much as she loves them. She deserves someone who loves as hard as she does — someone that will always fight for her, and never take her for granted. Girls like her always find love again, because they have so much to give.

Girls like her come around once in a lifetime. They are hard to love, but they are always worth it. They don’t fall easily, but when they do, they set a standard. They make it hard to ever love anyone else the same way again.

When a girl like her stops trying, you’ve lost her for good. When a girl like her stops loving you, you’re never going to get her back. Ever.


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