you aren’t “too needy”

you just have needs

Not everyone you have feelings for is capable of meeting your needs — that doesn’t mean they don’t care or that they don’t want to. Nor does it make them a bad person. It just means that they’re not right for you. And that’s okay.

Listen, it’d be a different story if you wanted to text 25/8 and spend so much time with your significant other you know the exact number of hairs on their head. It’d be a different story if you were destructively jealous and needed to know exactly what they were doing at all times. It’d be a different story if you were emotionally dependent on your partner.

But, it’s another thing if you feel needy or crazy for asking for something simple that your partner is incapable of giving you — and sis, that means it’s time to go. You are not crazy. You are not too attached. Yes, yes, we all know you have a lot of love to give. Relax, you will find someone who treats you the way you want to be treated.

A person you care about who dismisses your needs and concerns has its way of diminishing your self-worth. A relationship where your needs aren’t being met has its way of amplifying your deepest insecurities, and making you feel crazy. Don’t let that feeling make you act crazy. Just leave. Want better for yourself.

I get it, it hurts. It hurts when the person you would work to give everything for, doesn’t reciprocate. But you don’t have to feel like this — sometimes you have to take care of yourself before anyone else — don’t cry over spilt milk.

It’s not crazy to want to feel important, wanted, and special to your significant other (ironically, it’s literally in the title). What’s crazy is staying in something that leaves you going to bed every night anxious and upset. You drive yourself crazy thinking you are crazy.

Have I said the word crazy too many times? Bear with me.

You get the point, when you come to know and understand your self worth, you come to realize that no person can make you feel “needy” for communicating your needs in a relationship. Take pride in the fact that you actually know what you want.

And then once you know, have the courage to let go of a relationship that is taking more from you than it is giving.

Can we destroy the notion that women have to be low-maintenance and unfeeling to be lovable? I mean, what century are we in? Why do we consider women who know their standards and communicate them to be “crazy”?

Most (I said most!) of us never asked for much — all we want are the little things. To get an occasional text to let us know you were thinking about us, to feel wanted, important to you.

It’s normal to feel a little crazy sometimes (and sometimes, accidentally act a tad bit crazy), but don’t let that feeling take over your life. Find someone worth spending your time, energy and emotional investment in. In the meantime, focus on you and your future, not your past, and everything will be OK, I promise.

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