17 Ways Getting A Master’s Degree In 9 Months Is Like Being Pregnant

by Kristin Marguerite Doidge

Kristin Marguerite Doidge
Neon Tommy

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  1. You tell yourself, “it’s just for nine months,” but once you do the math, it’s actually more like 40 weeks.
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2. At the outset, it seems like a good idea, but every so often you irrationally ask your friends if you can “just back out.”

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3. New afflictions like anxiety and acid reflux suddenly appear.

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4. Mood swings include pure unadulterated exhilaration, hypoglycemic-related spouts of anger, and unannounced bursts of tears for seemingly no reason at all.

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5. Nightmares frequently feature themes of inadequacy and utter panic.

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6. You’ll exercise again after “these crazy 9 months are over.”

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7. Your romantic life has become, well, sort of non-existent.

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8. You’re suddenly and fiercely protective — and very proud — of your “work.”

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9. You get excited about a “night out” — which includes being in bed by 9pm with a cup of tea and the latest “House of Cards” episode.

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10. Late night (fine, all day…) cravings include chocolate, candy, macarons, ice cream, and pretty much anything salty.

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11. You’ve never been so excited about the prospect of sleep before in your life.

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12. Your friends will help you get through it.

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13. There are times you wish it would be over…

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14. …But you’ll be sad when it is.

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15. There will be some pain and agony throughout the process…

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16. …But the beautiful reward in the end is totally worth it.

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17. When it’s all over, you’ll reminisce and wish you could do it all over again.

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Follow me on Twitter or contact me here. I’ll get back to you when I’m done crying over nothing. You can also follow me on Twitter. Oh darn it, I already said that.

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Kristin Marguerite Doidge
Neon Tommy

Left-handed. Journalist. @USCAnnenberg Alum. @UCSanDiego Alum. Dreamer. Will work for Post-its. #imagine #kindnessmatters #dontquityourdaydream #binders