I learned a lot from my failures. We need spaces for experimentation and growth.
“I have always been an explorer!” With a bright smile, breathtaking candor, and authenticity, Dovan Rai, Ph.D., takes us through the incredible journey that has been her life.
Dr. Rai got her Ph.D. in Computer Science from Worcester Polytechnic Institute, where she worked in education technologies. She identifies herself as a socialist feminist and is a writer, programmer, and designer. Dr. Rai is currently working as a Research Fellow at Global Institute for Interdisciplinary Studies (GIIS), coordinating the research group ‘AI and Emerging Technologies for Sustainable Future.’ She is also a co-founder of Sujhaab Chautaari, a career counseling platform for the youth of Nepal.
As a young girl, Dr. Rai loved making crafts, reading books, and indulging in sports. Maths and Science were her two favorite subjects in school. When asked about how she started in tech, she reflects, “Maths and problem solving have always been my thing.” She fondly remembers how computer programming introduced to her in grade 9 had her hooked. “I was intrigued by how we could use maths and creativity to make beautiful things. I used to ask teachers to let me use the computers even after school!”
Back when Dr. Rai was in school, boys used to aspire to become doctors and girls nurses. Computers were new to everyone, and when she would express her desire to study computers in the future, she used to get satirized. However, that didn’t put her off because she always believed that computing would eventually become a sought-after field of study.
After her plus two, Dr. Rai received a Bachelor’s Degree in Electronics and Communication Engineering from Pulchowk Campus, Institute of Engineering. She remembers how she was among the only few women pursuing engineering. “I went through a lot of sexism and harassment in Pulchowk Campus. Boys would constantly undermine us girls despite knowing that we were good at what we did.” This made her go through a good deal of discouraging experience. “My project partner was a boy, and we put the same amount of hard work into it. But to my disappointment, the professor gave me lower marks. I stood up to him and fixed the marks later on, but that made my confidence go down.” Nonetheless, she pushed on and got offers from top software companies. As soon as her finals were over, she joined D2Hawkeye Services as a software engineer and switched to Creative Engineering after a year.
The unrest caused by the Royal Massacre and then the civil war left a deep impression on how Dr. Rai viewed her society. These new perspectives led her to join Patan Campus to study Sociology. Eventually, Dr. Rai got interested in three areas of study; Artificial Intelligence, Design, and Sociology, and discovered a passion for ‘AI in Education.’
“I always loved coding and was fascinated by the things we could achieve through it. Yet, I felt like coding resembled solving a Rubix cube to some extent. Yes, I was enjoying it, but I was doing the same thing over and over again. Though I was learning, I was far from being wiser. I wasn’t getting to know about the whereabouts of the world. The feelings became stronger as I saw changes in our society with the Royal Massacre and the civil war that followed.
In 2008, Dr. Rai got the Fulbright Science and Technology Ph.D. Scholarship. She began her new journey at Worcester Polytechnic Institute. Her university was great, but it was relatively small, and since it only offered degrees in science and technology, she missed the diverse intellectual environment offered in other universities. “I didn’t think twice after I got the scholarship, but I should have researched everything before making decisions. At the time, I wasn’t sure what to look for in a Ph.D. program or graduate school. I felt like studying in a university with a vibrant social life can be beneficial in many ways. It was an emotional rollercoaster.”
In graduate school, Dr. Rai chose independent research and explored causal modeling, which was challenging yet interesting. She took a gap year during her Ph.D. and worked at OLE Nepal as a Content Designer and Reviewer, where she designed educational software for public schools in Nepal. Then she went back and completed her Ph.D.
“Sometimes, I didn’t know the gravity of the decisions I was making. But I learned a lot from my failures, and as long as we don’t repeat our mistakes, it is okay.”
During her Ph.D., she realized the importance of mentorships, which led her to start Sujhaab Chautaari, through which she wants to build a platform for information sharing and mentorship in Nepal. Having experienced the tech scenario in Nepal and the USA, she feels like there’s a lack of direction in Nepal. “Since there are limited tech companies, people are driven by the market trends rather than their passion. That results in relatively lesser confidence and imagination. We want to change that.”
Dr. Rai stresses the necessity to redefine technology. She firmly believes that if we broaden the definition of technology and what it means to be good in technology,’ more girls will pursue a tech career. She thinks that the misunderstanding about the purpose of technology has driven many young girls away from pursuing a career in tech.
“Technology is not just about gadgets, models, and optimization. It is also about imagination, creativity, and creating value. Women can bring diverse experiences, new perspectives, and new ways of solving problems. Women, in general, prioritize human and social wellbeing and sustainability besides only success and efficiency. This could be a result of them being marginalized which forces them to be mindful of holistic aspects. If we can convey to them that tech needs the insights of women to create more responsible solutions and avoid catastrophic ones, I’m sure the numbers would increase.”
Apart from her feats in social technology, she is also a lovely writer; she has penned beautiful poems and write-ups for leading Nepali publications. Dr. Rai, who is always in touch with her interests, believes that her curious and playful attitude towards life is her biggest strength. Referring to the world as her playground, she says that her love for learning and taking learning as an act of play kept her going.
“As long as we accept our weakness, and there is a sense of purpose and vision of how our actions fit into the wider world, we are good to go.”
Having faced numerous failures throughout her journey, she emphasizes the importance of not comparing failure with stupidity. “It would be a disaster if you keep repeating your failures, but so long as you’re learning from them and realizing that even the so-called smart people make mistakes early on, you are likely to realize that the value you’ve created is much bigger than any of your failures.”.
Dr. Rai highlights the value of understanding your inner self and aspirations and also knowing when to seek help and support. “Sometimes we’re struggling, but we don’t know what’s going on. We are just trying to cope. We are just reacting to our circumstances. I wasn’t aware that I needed such help and support. I believed I was strong and I was trying to be strong. But the unfavorable circumstances and my own dysfunctional coping mechanisms had taken a toll on me. it was something I needed to solve until much later. So, knowing when you need help and reaching out for help is very important.”
She encourages girls to be proactive and find a community where they can share their problems and listen to each other’s stories.
“I want to motivate girls to explore the dynamic world of tech from the secure spot between self-awareness and a support system. Tech can be fun, fulfilling, and financially stable, providing women with the much-needed independence and a great opportunity to contribute to our collective future.”
This story was written by Ila Adhikari, the Story Series Manager of Nepali Women in Computing.
