How to date a Programmer
What’s not to love about programmers? You would have never been a TikToker without their patience in building a platform that serves billions of users. You would have never called your family from abroad if they didn’t care enough to develop Skype or Viber. They are the poor souls who create Tinder for you to date your preferred guy or gal while not bothering to go out and meet new people.
Enough with the pity arguments about programmers; in a century where data is considered oil, they are the ones with the money—no need to feel sorry about them. If knowing how to code is the most sought-after skill in 2023, learning how to date a programmer is worth developing since programmers deserve to be loved and respected. Otherwise, they will lose their sh*t like Elon Musk and try to put chips in your brain. Would you be interested in that?
Why do most programmers we know have a history of divorce?
My assumption is that people have never learned how to date programmers and don’t seem to care about their feelings.
It is all ones and zeros. True or false? Yes or no.
Trust me when I say this. Learning to code shapes your thinking into a binary format where there’s no middle point or room for certainty and uncertainty to mix up. When a programmer asks you out for dinner, the answer s/he is expecting is yes or no. You don’t just give mixed signals and wait for him or her to give it another shot and wait for the right moment. If you think about it, it is a lot easier to communicate that way. Otherwise, you’re wasting his or her debugging time.
Don’t assume he or she will be interested in a random idea you have come up with and help you make it into an app.
When people see a programmer, they assume that he or she would be eager to build their next billion-dollar app, if not fix the printer or hack their boss’s Telegram account. Please don’t ask your programmer crush to build the next Angry Birds. I assure you that they will build you something cool if they have time, but not if you ask them to.
Be interested, please!
I understand most of the things they discuss don’t make sense to you, but it is wise to listen to them when they constantly brag about the fix they did that didn’t even make it to prod. Be attentive when they tell you they have contributed to a feature build, even if you can’t see it on the app’s screen. Semicolons are their default jokes, so make sure to laugh when they tell you they have been trying to debug their code for hours, missing a semicolon on line 235. I swear that shit is funny (at least for a C++ programmer).
With that said, I would like to thank you for reading my rant to the end. I hope I have given you insight into what to do and what not to do while trying to date someone who codes. A quick disclaimer I have for you is to not bother trying to date a JavaScript developer. You would not regret this.
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