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How to Let Go After A 27-Year Relationship Ends

Hogan Torah
New Choices
Published in
6 min readJul 30, 2024
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio from Pexels:

My sister and her ex-husband have been a part of each other’s lives since they were 14. He was the first and last guy my sister brought home to meet our parents. For 27 years their relationship was exceptionally compatible personified.

After high school they moved up Humboldt together for college. Then they graduated, got married, bought a house, couple of dogs, and 2 kids.

On Instagram my sister flaunted pictures of her beautiful happy family doing activates together. Hundreds of pictures each with hundreds of likes begrudgingly from envious lonely people like me.

I was shocked when Mom told me my sister and her husband weren’t doing well. Cerise and Richard were always doing well. You could set your watch by it. They shared a brain and were attached at the hip. What happened?

One day my sister asked her husband, “What’s wrong?” Richard told his wife he didn’t love her anymore. Didn’t want to go to counseling. Wasn’t interested in working it out. Wouldn’t give a reason besides not wanting to be with her anymore.

They worked out the money and custody. My sister gets to keep the house that’s falling apart. He’s paying her mortgage for a year. She keeps her pension. They keep the kids for 3 days at a time each.

A few weeks later, he moved out of the house.

They never fought. Which may have been part of the problem. She would tell him what to do, he’d say yes dear and do it. Cerise called the shots.

Richard never complained or said no when my sister told him what to do. I never sensed any contempt from him.

I believe my sister when she said she was completely blindsided. No warning signs, nothing changed. Just woke up on the wrong side of the bed one day and dumped her.

Richard’s true love is fishing. When they moved to Humboldt he made it his career. Today he’s a commercial fisherman owning a fleet of boats and more passionate about catching fish than being with his family. When it’s fish season he’s out at sea for days.

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New Choices
New Choices

Published in New Choices

Mindfulness, sexuality, and life experiences, all inform and reflect our choices. We write about life’s many choices and where they lead.

Hogan Torah
Hogan Torah

Written by Hogan Torah

Lovable af 🥰 Son of a Mouseketeer 🎥 25 years of online publishing 💎 Google me, I autofill

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