Can Three Hours Decide Your Life?
What happened that kept me away from writing?
Today is 4 May. After 10 days, I opened my laptop and succeeded in writing this piece. I tried every day to pen down my thoughts but my mind was so disturbed that even sentences doesn’t make sense. And believe me, that’s the most distressing thing as a writer.
Firstly sorry for my absence and today I will tell you elaborately what happened.
I was in my office, doing the usual laptop work, when my phone rang. I generally avoid calls during my work hours, but it was my sister, and I was expecting something.
So I picked up the phone, and she said,
‘No, it didn’t happen.’
I couldn’t digest it. I stood up and went outside in the open asking her again what she said. She repeated, ‘Yes, it didn’t happen again,’ followed by an intense sobbing.
I didn’t reply, my eyes were wet too, but I was controlling myself. The next question was, ‘Now what?’
I broke at this. We both were crying on the phone. I didn’t know what to say to console her.
My sister was preparing for an entrance exam and she poured her heart and soul into it. She gave three of them. The first one she missed by 5 marks, the second by 15 and this was the third and the most important for her.
Luckily my father came to listen to my sister’s cries, and I got time to digest the news.
The question now what, had a big impression on my head. She sat with my father and hung up the phone.
I came back inside, sat on the chair, and opened my laptop but I can’t concentrate. My eyes were on the screen but my mind was elsewhere. I stared at the screen for about 40 minutes without pressing a single key. I understood; I couldn’t do this any longer. I packed my bag and went to my boss for half day's leave.
Obviously, she didn’t consider my mental health as a valid reason for leaving but I was not in a condition to listen to her. I walked out of the cabin, saying I am leaving. She shouted that my wages will be reduced, but I didn’t give it a fuck.
I left, wondering about the alternatives. I knew the privates are always the solution but I never wanted her to go to any of them.
Within 10 minutes of walking, she called me again. I exhaled, telling myself to be strong for her. I picked up. She sounded better than the first time but she was upset.
She told me her rank is just 500 more than the cutoffs.
I gathered the strength to ask her, ‘Where it went wrong?’
To that, she replied, ‘The first round was good; I did well. My second round didn’t go well. I wanted to add more things but the time was less. I couldn’t stand up to my expectations. But it was fine. I never thought that my work was so bad that I wouldn’t even clear the cutoff.’
‘Those three hours decided your fate?’ That was my instant reply.
‘Yes, those three hours decided my future!’
‘No sister, a few hours couldn’t decide your life, it never will. Yes, things are a bit difficult now but that doesn’t mean life has ended. Sometimes you win sometimes you lose but it’s fine. That’s life.’
I thought this will console her but she replied, ‘I only lost, I lost three of the exam. Then how are you saying sometimes you win sometimes you lose! Where is my win?’
Read my reply here
These few days were very stressful for me. My sister can’t give her 100% in those three hours and because of that, we have to search for alternatives. Sometimes it’s difficult to understand how a few minutes decide your ultimate result regardless of those sleepless nights you put into to reach there. But that’s how it is.
Thanks for reading :)
