One Day, My Diet Will Be The Death Of Me!
But that’s a risk I’m willing to take
Me and food, we go together like donner meat and pitta with house sauce all smothered on top. We have this connection, food and I. It’s a bond we cannot break.
Everyone’s on a health kick these days: juice cleanse this, kale shakes that. Not me though, I’m happy with my daily dose of king kebabs and loaded fries. I’m on my way to the local diner licking my lips just thinking about what sauce to choose to have with my chicken wings today — will it be chipotle or garlic mayo? I’ll wait until I’m inside because I like the element of surprise!
My diet’s awful. But as the saying goes, “You’re only here once. So, YOLO!” I’m enjoying myself. And while I do, here are some of my favorite foods:
- Blueberry waffles topped with ice cream and drowned in maple syrup
- Bacon baps with butter and brown sauce for days
- Battered Mars bars
- A triple helping of Lucky Charms with a pint of dairy milk straight from the cow’s teet!
- Soda rolls filled with sausage, egg, cheese, and a whole load of ketchup
- Caramel squares from the local bakery.. (“Just the three today Jim. I’m on a diet!”)
- Ribs and wings Texan style with Texan BBQ sauce that came straight from Texas
- Double chocolate glazed doughnuts with all the sprinkles and extra sprinkles
- Loaded sweet potato fries with bacon, fried onions, and the sauce of the day!
- Kinder Easter Eggs (just because it’s Easter)
- Quadruple stacked pancakes just like momma used to make!
- Dime bar cheesecake with Belgian chocolate ice cream and a drizzle of toffee flavored syrup
- A 4-pack of Rollo yogurts (because you can’t just have one!)
- A 4-pack of Smarties yogurts (because you can’t just have Rollo flavored ones!)
- A 12-pack of Budweiser beer
- Bottle of tequila for when the guys have a party
- Bottle of Jack Daniel’s whisky for when the guys have an after party
Ok, I’m getting hungry (and thirsty)… I’ll stop there for now — I gotta eat!
Much love to you all and never forget to enjoy your food,
Nathan Vine
