The Best Advice My Deadbeat Father Told Me On The Way To The Airport
Wisdom does not discriminate
My father had been the last person I wanted to drive to the airport.
He and my mother had divorced when I was six years old. After the divorce, many birthdays were forgotten, and visits to our apartment became less frequent, often stretching out over months.
My father no longer wanted to be a father to me.
He had another child, my sister, whom he cherished, giving her everything my brothers and I didn’t get. I taught myself how to shave. Through trial and error, I learned about girls and dating. A Guyanese woman taught me how to drive.
My father had not been a father to me or my brothers. The only connection we shared was through blood.
However, as an adult, I came to appreciate the relationship my father and I had formed; we didn’t call each other except for some holidays and emergencies. But there were times he broke this unwritten rule.
On the drive to the airport, we talked about working for the City of New York and money, his favorite topic. Then I told him about my job at the time, working as a detention officer in a county prison. I shared with him my dreams of becoming a writer and my desire to be free from working for someone else.
Then he said the most unexpected thing to me.
“Son, you have to go through something to get something.”
The man who had come to my wedding and given me a check that bounced had spoken wisdom to me.
He didn’t have to do that; I hadn’t asked for it. Not only was this great advice, but it also proved that he could be a father to me.
Change was possible.
Copyright @ 2023 James Anthony Maxwell. All rights reserved.
