The Case of the Flying Pitbull
He landed right in front of me.
By Raphael Danziger
Anyone of a certain age has witnessed many strange events. This one was stranger than most—at least in my own, very long experience.
I was walking on a sidewalk along a quiet side street in a small East San Francisco Bay town. My destination was my daughter’s home, where I was looking forward to walking her beautiful Alaskan Malamute.
Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed a big old Chevy coming up from behind me. When it was flush with me, a large, muscular Pitbull flew out of the car’s open rear window in a high arc and landed on the grassy strip separating the sidewalk from the street just a couple of feet in front of me. He rolled over like an experienced paratrooper and ended up on his feet facing me.
I had two initial thoughts. First, did he aim at me because I had done something he didn’t like but had a near miss? Second, is he going to charge at me now?
These thoughts were triggered by what I had read about Pitbulls, with which I had never interacted. I love dogs and pet them whenever I can, but never Pitbulls. They have such a fierce reputation for aggressiveness and unpredictability that dozens of countries worldwide and many U.S. localities have banned them outright.
Fortunately, I was wrong on both counts. Instead of charging, the dog raised his hind leg and started peeing… and peeing…and peeing… There was no end in sight.
Meanwhile, while the dog was still peeing, his owner noticed what had happened. He backed up, got out of his car, and apologized…and apologized…and apologized.
I assured him no apology was needed. I then praised him for training his dog so well that even when his bladder was about to explode, he avoided peeing in the car, waited for an opportune moment, leaped onto the soft grassy strip, not on the hard pavement, and then peed only on the grassy strip, not on the sidewalk. That was indeed an impressive performance! We both laughed.
After what seemed like an eternity, the dog finally stopped peeing. The owner opened his car’s rear door, the dog happily jumped in, and the owner departed after one final apology.
While reflecting on this amusing incident, I realized this dog was exceptionally intelligent. He knew there would be dire consequences if he peed in his owner’s car. He understood that landing on a soft grassy strip would hurt less than landing on the hard sidewalk. He even knew that rolling over upon landing would further soften the blow. He also knew no one wanted to walk on a sidewalk covered with dog pee.
I wish all dogs were as smart and as considerate!
Raphael Danziger
An avid cyclist, I worked for decades as a Middle East analyst. Now retired, I enjoy my wonderful family, including three adorable grandchildren.
Tags: New Writers Welcome / Life / Humor / Dogs
