The Truth About Forgiveness
Virtue or Vice?
Forgiveness is a complicated topic because of the many different ways to define it. For some, forgiveness means forgetting about what happened and moving on. For others, it might mean acknowledging what happened but not letting it define them or their relationship with the person who hurt them. And for some people, forgiveness is impossible.
I don’t understand people who ask for forgiveness. Something like:
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to step on your foot.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to show up.”
For me, “see you later” means “see you later,” “I love you” means “I love you,” you know? If I say: “You can count on me. I’ll be there.”, you know that I will, but if someone says that to me, I wouldn’t believe it. And that’s because the meaning of the words is lost and has been since I was a kid. That happens when you’re using the exact words repeatedly and not going by them.
It’s the same with “I’m sorry,” too. People take it so lightly, and it shouldn’t be like that.
“Punishment precedes the crime” is something Dostoevski said because before someone does something, they know the pain it will generate and feel guilty. That guilt is the punishment, so why ask for forgiveness without taking responsibility?
People think it’s enough to redeem themselves just by saying they’re sorry. The reality is that, sometimes, even if you ask for forgiveness by crying, screaming, on your knees, in multiple languages, it won’t be enough.
It is because saying “sorry” isn’t enough, it doesn’t change nor fix anything, and it does not relieve you unless you take responsibility for your actions.
That is when something might start to change.
To sum up:
Forgiveness is often seen as a virtue we should all strive to do. And while forgiveness can be a good thing, it’s also important to understand that forgiveness is not always easy and is not always possible. Sometimes, forgiveness is not an option, and that’s okay. What’s important is that we do not judge others for their decision to forgive. We each have our journey to walk, and what works for one person may not work for another. So if you’re struggling with forgiveness, know that you’re not alone. And there is no right or wrong answer, only what’s best for you.
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