When You Move Abroad At The Age Of Thirteen
Learning a new language, culture, people, and places…
Even though we were preparing our documents to move abroad, the journey was a sudden decision because of certain circumstances. I was thirteen. I was happy that I finally got to live with both of my parents. And Italy, in my dreams, appeared like a fairy-tale world, full of luxury, beauty, and style.
On a freezing cold and windy evening in October, I landed in the land of pasta and pizza. The flight journey was tiring, and I wasn’t wearing heavy clothes.
The first thought?
I want to lie down on a fluffy bed
It took almost two hours of travel to reach our home from the airport. I was tired and just wanted to sleep even though hunger was torturing me.
The next day I woke up with a new energy. The view from our window was stunning — Western Mediterranean that stretches endlessly. It was the first time I saw the sea after a long time, and the exciting part was it was from our own window! On the other side of our apartment, there were long hill ranges. In summary, I could see the sea and the hills at a time from my home!
For a few days, I boasted about it to my friends and cousins. But slowly, I became homesick. I didn’t know the language, I didn’t know the places, I didn’t know the culture, and I didn’t know the people. I felt stupid. The only comfort was that view from my window. The heavenly world I always dreamed about became hell!
I started missing my friends and cousins. It became hard to make new friends. I was shy. Thankfully, there were some Indian students at my school who spoke my language and I tried to seek comfort in talking to them. But, it was really not enough. Things became harder. Learning a new language and culture, and learning things in a new language destroyed my self-confidence. I felt dumb about not knowing so many things.
School life became tough. I was always sitting in a corner without speaking to anybody. I started failing my exams, which never happened to me in my home country. I always came in one of the first three positions in my class when I was in India. To avoid being left behind, I began memorizing everything, which I really hated doing.
It took me two to three years to adjust to the new reality of my life. I felt an emptiness in my heart during all those times. I always questioned whether I belong here or not. I felt inferior to the ones who spoke the language really well. I didn’t dare to come forward and speak up for myself. I tried to rely on others.
It has been more than a decade, and when I think about those times I wonder how I was unaware of the difficulty I was facing. Because then, my only goal was to come out of the situation without giving much thought to the toughness. But now, when I revisit those pages of my life, I realize how hard it was.
It’s always been like that. We face hardships, and our instant intent is to solve those problems. Only after a long time do we realize how difficult it really was for us.
