Why Your Existence Feels Overwhelming
A seemingly never-ending predicament called existence.
I’ve spent so much time thinking what to write about. I’m asleep mostly and escaping away the days, hoping it will all pass soon.
Sleep usually doesn’t make one’s problems go away-I’ve had first-hand experience-, and there comes a time that sleeping ad nauseum makes one nauseous.
Hypersomnia is all but one hedonic remedy to a seemingly never-ending predicament called existence.
There seem only two ways to bear it, either avoid it or end it.
And these two merge at some point in time as one is immersed in chronic procrastination from one’s own self and destiny that they lose sight of who they are and what they are and inevitably their purpose to live.
Filled to the brim with meaningless hedonic pleasures that rot and deteriorate any sense of decency or self-respect. Making one feel wasted and washed out; ashamed of their lack of discipline and making one lose all their hope.
It’s a tunnel at the end of which there is no light and it’s a tunnel that one bores in real time-a rabbit hole dug deeper and deeper till one ends up so deep that the light cannot reach them.
But why does one voluntarily do that to themself?
Why on earth? Is existence really that bad? Is it really that painful that one must dedicate their whole life escaping it? And what good is that escape if it ends up becoming the main thing that it was supposed to protect us from…which is not existence but suffering.
There’s a philosophical error in this entire equation. The individual who relies on dopaminergic bursts of joy to make their existence bearable has a serious error in their deeper psyche.
This psyche or philosophical error compels the individual to default into self-destruction.
It makes them hopeless, pessimistic, and cynical before they even have the chance to give themselves a chance at anything in life.
This life is too dark, dreary, and miserable, so there’s no point in living it. No matter what one does, they will always suffer in this world. Hence, they resign to their metaphorical alcoholism to drown their disdain and pessimism.
Philosophical dilemmas pushed aside, this seems to go against one’s common sense as well, no? One is so drenched in their own loathing and self-inflicted misery. That they lose to acknowledge the simplicity of its solution and hurt themselves instead.
Are you supposed to be safe all the time? Are you supposed to not feel pain, grief, and illness? Are you supposed to go through life not experiencing failure or loss ever? Are you supposed to be invincible? Invulnerable? And no one can hurt you? And are you supposed to succeed at everything you do? Are you perfect? Are you special? Are you the exception to life’s rules?
Hmm…. it’s something to think about, is it not? If you feel called out, then that’s alright it means a barrier to awareness is being shaken, and it can soon break if you choose to break it. It’s a higher calling to who you really are, especially once you stop holding yourself back.
Suffering, pain, and struggle is inevitable. You can’t dodge it. You can’t cheat life’s design. And thinking that you can speed run everything without facing any struggle or challenge is not realistic or rational. This thinking alone overwhelms you and overcomplicates your response to life itself and makes you want to not face anything.
What you’re supposed to do is to take your suffering and derive meaning out from it for yourself, transform it into a purpose that will empower you.
Don’t be afraid of the bad that could happen to you because you really can’t control a lot of things, and it’s not your fault. You’ll stumble, fall, and get back up. It’s okay.
Your only responsibility is to use all your resources in the best capacity as you can to make your life worth living. And that’s that.
This is important because when life hits you, you will ask yourself this question…why did this happen to me? Or what was it all for? And if you don’t haven’t an adequate answer, then you might not want to exist anymore.
You can do whatever you put your heart and mind to. You can. I believe in you. Stop holding yourself back.
I’ll see you then. Till my next post.
