THIS HAPPENED TO ME| ON DISCRIMINATION
The Art of Discrimination at a Truck Stop
Just make sure you look the right way when traveling or else you might be asked to leave for no reason
A fierce introduction and some background information
I will start this off by saying I’m very angry. I’m fed up with being discriminated against for one reason or another. I actually had to calm down before I wrote down my thoughts on this. This happened a little over a day ago and I’m only starting to see things more clearly and bigger picture. I hope to offer you something to take away from this harrowing experience.
My partner and I are full-time RVers. We travel before camping season in the springtime and again after until about November when we prefer to settle down in a particular campground, if possible. I’ll come back to this part when explaining some of the context later in the truck stop in question.
The winter before this year, we were stuck in our old tiny home box truck at a truck stop after our rig had died. This last year, we had the opportunity to stay in a very beautiful campground in Erie County, Pennsylvania.
We left that beautiful and peaceful setting this week. We have started traveling again and slow-crawling out of necessity because I can’t and shouldn’t do any heavy traveling whenever it’s possible. I’m on a ton of medications for pain and my conditions and driving at night is a dangerous venture for me as well. We’re both disabled. We have to travel at our own pace.
A welcoming truck stop that didn’t discriminate and what that looked like
Our stop right after camp was just as amazing as our campground. We even had super fast internet and a welcoming and friendly staff who warmly greeted us and welcomed us with open arms. After all, we were paying customers and were paying for our spot there. We had bought food, drinks, and used the bathroom, and took showers when no truckers were waiting for a spot.
We came in mostly overnight so as not to interfere with the truckers as we know that their top priority is to get rested and get showered and have what they need before getting back on the road. We’ve always respected that. We’re always mindful of that everywhere we go.
That’s why the Pilot in Erie County welcomed us, loved that we were giving them business, and didn’t cause a problem for us while we were there. We went just about fifteen miles down the highway and it was a stark comparison, a much different story.
A bigger truck stop with much more parking, both paid and unpaid, was calling us. We’d been here a few times before. We’d even had the opportunity, with previous permission, to stay here previously in our old tiny home for about a couple of months when our old home had issues moving. They were under new management the last time we checked.
Getting the cops involved despite being law-abiding and paying customers
So in November, before we got to our campground this year, we stopped at Travel Centers of America (TA) in Harborcreek, PA. Many of the staff knew us from before and welcomed us with open arms. Management was hands-off or seemed indifferent. We were spending money and were sociable and friendly to all of the employees. We were parked out of the way where no truck would want to park but still in the truck parking area.
After the weekend had been up, we woke up to a surprise knock at our door after we had slept. It was a police officer. What had happened? What could we have possibly done to get a cop at our door? Obviously, being the law-abiding, authority-fearing people we are, we answered the door and made sure to cooperate and comply with the uniformed officer.
We were told that the manager wasn’t sure if anyone was in the RV. We had clearly exited and entered the RV so many times. This confused me to no end. But we apologized for that and the police officer asked us for our contact information. Nothing else was relayed. The officer gave the number to the manager and we informed them we were leaving that day anyway.
After we left, we gave no second thought to it as we went on for months to our winter spot. After leaving that very welcoming Pilot Travel Center, we went to this Travel Centers of America and parked in a similar spot to before, one that a truck wouldn’t want to park in and also one that a truck couldn’t even fit in. We were tucked away in the corner, out of sight and out of mind. Or so we thought.
Coming back to a familiar truck stop hoping for a break and some rest
We went outside to get everything situated and secured as we planned to stop for the weekend as we did before. We even were prepared to find a way to compensate the travel center for welcoming us back here after so many months. We were visible holding hands, being a tad affectionate with each other, but not too close to the public eye. I did see one onlooker get on his phone near us but thought nothing of it.
Not even an hour had passed after we had stopped and parked for the night and another cop came up to us. A beautiful and young polite female police officer came over and surprised my partner while he was tightening something on the back of our RV.
“I don’t understand why this is happening but I’ve been called over here because the manager recognized you guys and wanted you gone,” she said calmly and politely, before asking my partner for his ID. He gave her the information and she went on her way. “Just make sure you guys are gone by the end of the night. I don’t really want to come back here. I really don’t feel like I should’ve been called here in the first place. You seem great,” she followed up.
Being displaced for who we are and how we live
Now our gay, disabled asses were about to be forced out of a place we just got comfortable and were very familiar with. Was it that we were gay or was it that our RV looks a little old and not what they want in their parking lot? I’ve seen the way the manager looked at us previously. He didn’t even need to say anything.
Even after we offered to pay for our spot as we were originally planning on doing even if we weren’t going to be in a paid spot that another trucker could use and pay for. We just needed a place to settle our tired, and sore bodies.
I had this strong suspicion that he didn’t like seeing an interracial, gay couple in an older RV under renovation at his place in rural Northwest Pennsylvania. In that instant, I knew that we weren’t welcome there. I didn’t feel welcome there.
I feel that if we even tried to stay as we did last time, the manager would show even more of his true colors. He would do everything in his power to make the gay, mixed couple feel very uncomfortable despite the fact that we spent so much money at his establishment.
Taking action after discriminatory activity
His actions spoke way stronger than any words could’ve. He saw people he didn’t personally like for one reason or another outside of their control and wanted them gone. Mike suspects he banned us when he called the cops last time and didn’t tell us. We still haven’t been told that by anyone at all.
We made sure to leave in the timeframe so we’d have more leverage to complain to corporate over this unfortunate situation. We didn’t want to create more drama in a place we were clearly not welcome. We also didn’t want more drama and trouble for ourselves. We were already tired.
We left a couple of hours later after we resecured everything and had a little time to relax so I didn’t have to drive extremely tired or fatigued. Imagine if they had just done that to a random, gay trucker or another person of color. They would’ve heard from the trucking company and probably would’ve had a lawsuit on their hands.
I’ve considered legal action at this point, even if I find out we’re not banned, solely on the discrimination front.
My hope for the consequences of these actions
I sent a letter to corporate explaining the unfortunate details of the events that transpired. I’m sure they’re not going to appreciate reading or hearing about this. Their company is getting further tarnished. They already had to be bought out by BP last year as they were already failing. They let the company run into the ground.
For travelers who are tired and just trying to survive, these are the only viable places for us to go to get sleep, a clean shower, food, and to get laundry done. These are all things I’ve been able to get done in even this particular travel center truck stop.
I’m hoping that when they see this, they offer to send out a memo company-wide or at least educate their management on how to better handle certain situations. This would’ve prevented this horrible situation. I hope to hear from them with an apology and a peace offering. I am planning on not ever going back to this particular location ever again, even if I were allowed to in the future.
I’ve left a review for it on Google. I want people to see what kind of place they’re supporting by stopping here. I don’t want the company to suffer. I just want to see this one location get it together and have a course of action going forward for anyone who would find themselves in a similar situation to my own.
I get that my situation is pretty unique but simple communication between the two parties would’ve been the best way from the start.
So what is the bigger problem?
Calling the cops on innocent travelers who happen to be gay and interracial is not a 2024 thing. It should’ve never been a thing. This is a sad reality still in parts of America. You need to look the part to not be messed with in certain parts of the country.
We already experienced discrimination similar to this once before at the Flying J Truck Stop Travel Center in Pembroke, NY last April. The fact that it happened again at a different location almost a year later is a tad disconcerting to me. And it speaks to a larger problem in American society. We treat people how we perceive them, and not for who they actually are. That’s a huge problem.
This is just one aspect of how that shows up. We’re lucky because we haven’t suffered major consequences for that. But we hope that never does happen. We’re surviving, living in our RV, and just trying to be left alone. No need to send the cops on us or look at us a certain way because you don’t like us or agree with how we live.
