Book Review: “The Way of the Superior Man” by David Deida

This book has made an amazing impact in my life, so I wanted to share it with you. Here are some quotes that can be broken down for further insight.

“A man’s worth can be found in the depth of his being. His breath, his gaze, his purpose.”

This means that a man’s worth can simply be found in every fiber of his being. All of it. A man’s purpose is his reason for being.

“Better to live with an open and hurting heart than a closed one.”

We cannot truly experience life if our hearts are closed. Our hearts must be open. An open heart experiences hurt, yet a closed one rarely experiences anything.

“Nothing that has ever happened made a difference to the one who you are.”

Your purpose and calling cannot be altered by any circumstance. Uncovering your purpose and pursuing it is the key to fulfilling your inner masculine.

“Never betray your intuition to please your woman.”

Once you have aligned with your purpose, you will know what to do, how to do it, and when to do it. Your woman may not agree, but you must stick with your intuition, and she will notice this. If you betray your intuition to please your woman, you will ultimately let her and yourself down.

“Your purpose should not be wavered by the approval of your woman, family, or friends. You are called to pursue it regardless of anyone else’s approval.” Even if you have not yet discovered your purpose, make finding your purpose, your purpose! Now pursue it. Some may disagree, but we cannot live for the approval of others. This is not a fulfilling life. Your inner masculine craves the pursuit of its calling, regardless of what your woman, your family, or your friends think. The metaphor of a soldier going to war is an excellent correlation. Their significant other obviously does not want them to go, yet it is the soldier’s purpose and their calling to go and serve. This is an example of masculine energy performing at its highest.

“The true essence of the masculine is freedom, and the true essence of the feminine is love.”

Masculine energy craves to be free. The feminine craves love. Understanding this is the way of the superior man.

“Make fear your friend. Embrace it. Be ready for the unknown. Own your fear and lean into it, not away from it.”

Fear can seep in and take control of you if you let it. It can sabotage opportunities. To prevent this, embrace the fear. Do not be consumed by it. Lean into it and use it to your advantage, knowing it is only an illusion.

“Hold moments with friends and family as holy. Devote to them your undivided attention. Afterwards, return to your purpose.”

Put the work away, and put the phone down. Fully embrace the personal moments life gives, and devote your focus to those whom you share these moments with. They will see this and appreciate your efforts. The keyword here is focus. Make sure that it is not scattered. The ability to harmonize personal and professional life is the way of the superior man.

“We will never do enough to feel complete. Knowing this, alter your tasks so that you are aligned with your purpose.” There will always be a checklist. There will always be more to do. Do not let this distract you from your purpose. You will never be able to hit all of your goals, because more will come, however you can always align your goals with your calling. This is the way of the superior man.

“Every moment of life is either a test or a celebration. The same is with your woman, only doubly so. One of her deepest pleasures is testing you, and feeling that you are not moved off course. She loves to know that you are who you are, regardless of an outside force.” There is a lot of masculine energy in the world that is not aware of this, because it is not commonly taught. This perspective alone has the power to heal many relationships. We must understand who we are inherently. When we do, and when our women test us, we can respond accordingly. What she wants is for you to rise to the occasion of her test.

“You want your women to test you, even in moments of personal gain or joy. You must know in your heart that no one can extinguish your joy, and she wants to see that.” Do not be the guy who depends on his woman’s reaction in order to feel joy. This is not stable, and stability is a representation of masculine energy operating at its highest. For example, if you close a big deal and your woman does not react in the same way you do, do not be discouraged. This is a test. Be happy regardless, and watch the stability of your emotions encourage your woman.

The masculine is all about “if I say it, I mean it”. Whereas feminine energy is more about being in the moment. She may say “I hate you, don’t talk to me” because she’s angry at you in that moment. However within the next day, hour, or even minute, she may offer the opposite reaction. Being a superior man means understanding the difference between feminine and masculine energy. Transcend your life, your woman, and your world with this knowledge.