Introductions are Necessary
Silence is quite possibly the easiest and most dangerous choice. Silence in a court case could result in a lifetime living among animals. Silence when losing the love of your life could equate to lonely nights condemned with regret. Silence within yourself, though, is the more immediate and realistic threat. Hiding your soul, the very reactants that heat your core, holds true danger. There are entire arteries within my heart dedicated to my childhood experiences, and I have decided to expose myself beyond societal curtains.
Today, my story will be told, mainly because introductions are things that should not be avoided.
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I suppose that separation was inevitable in a family which thrived in such different realms of the world. Contestants in this game of survival include: a brother- wild at heart with the ache for passion and no ultimate direction, always emitting a contagious love for people that promoted happiness, a father- scathed from a treacherous past, labeled as a thick- skulled runner and a non-fighter employer of fighters, a mother- surrounded by a regime of soldiers running only through their faith in her, but still she falls with such strength. Then, there was me. Maybe it was being the youngest of the group of tangled vines, or maybe it was my absent, adventurous attitude. Whatever the cause, I was an active bystander of all that awaited me inside the crowded walls of my home. I had predicted the divorce and separation of my parents long ago- years of fighting and crying and lying had told me that much.
Yet, I had never expected to climb such high mountains.
My brother, being four years older than me, had the ability and the common sense to escape. Addiction trampled most mothers and fathers within my family, specifically with alcohol. My mother was no exception. I obtained about eleven years, but had a mentality that a fifteen year old may possess. Never had I realized that my family being so absent meant that I would have to be so present, and so began my struggle between silence and outspokenness. There were many instances that resonate with me, but sharing them in the second blog post of my career seems like I would be taking my relationship with Medium much too quickly.
All that can be said about the next two and a half years of my life is this- I was terrified, I was broken, and I survived.
I grew passionate for the interlocking pattern of the human heart and soul. I danced with the idea of strength in independence, with the idea that even in your most lonesome moment, your mind is your strongest friend. I grew to see language as a canvas and speech as a weapon. The interesting aspect of a weapon is that it is always useful, and always causes glorious outcomes in the arms of those worthy of holding it.
Because of this experience, I concluded that I must do what is right. I must tell my story. I must tell people what I experienced in those few years, what people lit my path, and what people destroyed my will. I must give those who are hiding in the darkness a common ground to stand on and a common friend to lock hands with.
I must allow others to draw strength from my tragedy, and teach them to love intensely.
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I plan to write the most transparent and unnerving novel written by an individual of only sixteen years. I am hoping that I can find support in this endeavor, and so I have been searching for someone who would be willing to hear my story and help me organize a lifetime most eventful. I am searching for what many call a “mentor”, but after this expedition, I would most likely label you as my friend. I also realize that this is not the only type of friend I desire.
Through my connectivity within Twitter and YouTube, I will also be searching for outstanding individuals in order to create a network of support. Nothing holds more power than understanding the workings of society. This is why I have made it my mission to develop myself as a strong and successful individual on social media and elsewhere; this has become my most immediate project within Mr. Wettrick’s class.
I invite you to travel deep into my thoughts, into an area where few have seen.
Will your bravery and tenacity persevere? Will you choose silence, or walk a beaten path that amounts to screaming your wildest thoughts?
-Cassidy Uhl, Innovator and Generator of Change
Twitter: https://twitter.com/CassidyUhl
