Why the Right People in Your Life Matter, Especially for the Nightshifter
When it comes to making friends and spending time with other people, quality is more important than quantity. The adage, “we are the company we keep,” is a bit of wisdom that everyone should keep in mind, especially those who work the night shift.
When we allow the wrong people to come into our lives, like those who are cynical or quick to spread negativity and fear, it is only a matter of time before their thoughts and attitudes rub off on us. This can be detrimental for night shift workers who are already at a greater risk for mood disorders due to a lack of sunlight, long hours, and disordered sleeping.
It’s already far too easy to go to work feeling exhausted and cranky because you’re running on a couple hours of sleep and you have a seemingly endless shift ahead of you. Having someone echo consistently remind you of the downsides of working the night shift will only make matters worse and cause you to spiral into negativity.
If you don’t want negative thoughts and feelings to take the steering wheel of your life, you have to be mindful of who you allow into your passenger seat. It’s important that we are able to cultivate relationships with people who we want to be like because the people we surround ourselves with have more of an impact on our lives than we might think.
Here are a few reasons why it is critical that we spend time with positive people:
We are Influenced by Other People’s Attitudes
Have you ever caught yourself saying something that one of your friends or one of your loved ones always says?
That’s because the more time you spend with someone, the more their colloquialisms and mannerisms will rub off on you.
This can make all the difference when it comes to your outlook on life. If you are surrounded by people who are always talking about how rough it is to work the night shift or how stressful an upcoming shift is going to be, you will start to have these feelings and doubts yourself.
If you’ve ever met someone who works at a zoo, they will tell you that there are some animal scents that are almost impossible to get off, even after multiple showers. In the same way that a zookeeper can’t expect to leave their shift without smelling like the animals they work with all day, you can’t expect to avoid negative thought patterns if you spend all day with people who spew negativity.
The same effect happens when you surround yourself with positive people. Even when you’re starting to feel down, their positive words and outlook on life will rub off on you and help you see your situation in a better light.
We are influenced by the people who we spend the most time with each day. Make it a priority to seek out people who have positive attitudes so that you can become a more positive person yourself.
Our Environment Shapes Our Expectations
The people we spend time with can help us manifest things into existence. No, this doesn’t mean that you all sit in a circle with candles and wish for something to come true. Rather it means that our attitudes and expectations can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
For instance, imagine that before you head into a shift at the hospital, your friend says, “Night shift after the big game? That sucks. Good luck with all the drunk people who come in tonight. Those are the worst shifts!”
Now, instead of feeling like you would on an ordinary day, you are likely to head into work with a negative attitude dreading what’s to come. Furthermore, when you go through your shift, all the bad experiences and drunk patients will stick out. Instead of thinking about the great things that happen during that shift, like finding a great parking spot or having a patient who gives you a sincere thanks or the funny joke your coworker told you, you reduce your shift to a culmination of every small negative thing that happens.
In this way, your coworker was right- your shift was the worst. However, this has less to do with the actual shift and more to do with your attitude. If you were able to approach your shift with a neutral or a positive mindset, you would have been more likely to notice and appreciate all of the small moments of positivity, which would have improved your overall experience working that shift.
This self-fulfilling prophecy phenomenon is often referred to as the Pygmalion effect. Consider the following excerpt from author Ben Hardy’s Willpower Doesn’t Work: Discover the Hidden Keys to Success:
“Consider the process of training fleas. A group of fleas is placed in a jar. Without the lid on the jar, the fleas can easily jump out as they please. However, with the lid in place, the rules of the environment are changed. Now jumping too high results in smashing into the lid, which doesn’t feel so great. Consequently, the fleas adapt to the new rules and quickly become trained not to jump so high. Interestingly, when the lid is removed three days later, the fleas no longer jump out of the jar. A mental barrier had been formed into the collective consciousness, and the group of fleas now has a more constraining set of rules.
Not surprisingly, the new rules and social culture of the fleas in the jar also influence the next generation of fleas, which go on to develop the same expectations for themselves as their parents had before them…By remaining in immediate and constant proximity to their parents, the next generation of fleas can’t transcend their environment.”
When you are always with people who have a negative approach to life, it will be hard for you to transcend your environment, and their attitudes will end up shaping your expectations until these expectations become a self-fulfilling prophecy or keep you from enjoying your life.
Positivity Builds Us Up
Not only is positivity contagious, but it can also grow rather quickly. Picture coming up with an idea that you think is pretty good and sharing it with a friend for them to respond enthusiastically about how your idea is actually pretty great. The next thing you know, as the two of you continue going back and forth building on the idea, you are growing increasingly excited about your plan.
Sometimes that little bit of encouragement and excitement is all that it takes to move something from just a small idea into an actual plan of action.
Similarly, when you have the right people in your life, they will be able to build you up in other areas. If you tell a friend that you have a late shift at the hospital, and they respond with enthusiasm and tell you that your work is meaningful and exciting, you’ll walk into your shift with your head held a little bit higher. If you complain about having to go to work, but your friends remind you that “at least you don’t have to sit through traffic!” and other benefits of working nights, it can change your perspective and help you build gratitude for your job.
As a night shift worker, one of the most important ways for you to take care of your mental and emotional health is to make sure that you have the right people in your life who will encourage you and spread positivity instead of negative thoughts. When your friends are positive thinkers, their attitudes will help influence your own, making it a lot easier for you to enjoy your time working nights.
Night Shift Nutrition is a community focused on living your best life, while working nights. We do this by sharing our experiences and science based educations. The point is to not only survive working nights but to thrive! If this sounds like something you’d like to be a part of you can apply to join our facebook group or subscribe to our email list.
