Who is Your Holy Guardian Angel?
And how do you come into deeper relationship with it?
I like to sometimes refer to my Holy Guardian Angel, my HGA, as my HSS, my High School Sweetheart.
My HGA is the person I was waiting for to sweep me off my feet and turn everything around.
In high school, I brutally rebuffed anyone who expressed any affection towards me. I pretended to allow myself to have friends, and then I would get drunk and tell them I hated them.
All the guys and girls that wanted to date me were repulsively kind and available. I pined after the numbskull jock who I got extra grades for tutoring.
A relationship with my HGA would have enabled me to be in alignment with allowing myself a life where I felt heard and held and seen.
Instead, I lived in tormented loneliness spending as much time as I could drunk or recovering alone in my room.
You do not build a relationship with your Holy Guardian Angel by escaping sensation or pain. You do not build a relationship with your Holy Guardian Angel by saying no to the intensity of honest sensation.
You build a relationship with your Holy Guardian Angel through presence and attention, like any other effective authentic relationship.
