How’s this for breathing room?

Be'Anka Ashaolu
Nirvana Soul
Published in
3 min readMay 21, 2019

Last week at work, my role was terminated. That’s a nice way of saying I was let go, which is a nice way of saying I was fired.

A shakeup like this can be devastating, particularly for a recovering perfectionist like me. But I’ve done a lot of work to ensure I don’t identify with things I can lose, and I’m happy to report I’m doing just fine. Fortunately, I also have an incredible support system that wouldn’t dare let me beat myself up anyway. So I’m trying really hard not to.

But without steady income, it has become much more difficult to secure a loan for Nirvana Soul. Not impossible, but much more difficult. Jeronica and I have been making a lot of progress towards our goal of opening up shop by saving money and connecting with lenders. Losing my job certainly throws a wrench in our plans.

So, of course, finding a new job is a major priority of mine. But, crazy as this might sound, it’s not my top priority. What I have to do right now is heal.

Shortly after I got the axe, I spoke with a mentor of mine who gave me the simple advice to just breathe. I hadn’t even noticed I’d been holding my breath! My last few years have been filled with so much craziness — from being rejected from business school to now losing my job and all the stuff in between I can’t even mention — that I’ve sort of just been moving nonstop from thing to thing without giving myself a moment to just be.

I believe the universe gives you what you need, and I definitely needed some breathing room. Now that I have time off, I’m looking forward to extending my self-care Sundays and filling myself back up with all the joy I’ve been missing out on. I’m committed to being my best self for my next gig, and I know that’s going to take some work.

What does this mean for Nirvana Soul? All great things, we hope! Nirvana Soul is already a self-care outlet for me so I’m just rounding it out. Jeronica and I love working together and we love creating something of our own. The difference is now I’ll get to really focus — which is awesome! — sit in cafes where I’m happy much longer, and even drink coffee. (Hey, I can stay up as late as I want to!) I’m sure there will be plenty of downsides to this unemployment thing, but seriously, what a treat this will be too?

I want to leave you with these words my vision party crew (the women I set intentions with, pray with, check in with, and stay encouraged with) gave me: 1) “The grind don’t stop!” and 2) “Be kind and gentle with yourself.”

No matter what obstacles you’re facing, keep going! Your dreams will come true and ours will too. Hang in there. We’ll see you at Nirvana Soul soon. :)

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Be'Anka Ashaolu
Nirvana Soul

Digital and demand gen marketer, retail and culture enthusiast, current Director of Marketing at a tech startup, and Nirvana Soul owner… on the side.