‘When they see my record, they want nothing to do with me’

Harold was arrested in 2003 for a sex offense and was let out a year later. Since then, he’s been struggling to find a full-time job. The 40 year old, who asked that his last name not be used, talks about the stigmas and difficulties felons face upon release.

Stephanie Cubias: What were you doing before your arrest?

Harold: I was living in Ohio, working full-time as a cashier at a grocery store and working any part-time job that I could find.

SC: Can you talk about your arrest?

H: There was an internet sting and my IP address was tracked, that’s how they got me. I was living in Pennsylvania, but since it was over the internet [the state of] New Jersey also had a case. In Pennsylvania I was arrested and sentenced in 2003. I went to jail for 13 months.

New Jersey had only given me probation, so after I was released from Pennsylvania in 2004, I went back to Ohio and I could serve my probation there. I lived with my dad and worked in construction for eight years. After a while I got really depressed, ended up homeless for three years, and I stopped meeting with my probation officer. When I started going to my PO again he said I could no longer stay in Ohio and that I had to go back to New Jersey.

In New Jersey I was arrested in 2013 for absconding, running from the authorities, because my parole officer from Ohio didn’t notify New Jersey I was coming and I spent six months in Middlesex County jail.

SC: Have you had any other encounters with the law since?

H: I had a minor violation in 2017. I was arrested for two weeks, then my mom bailed me out. But it was dismissed and taken off my record.

SC: Can you talk a little about your time in jail?

H: I was in protective custody. I wasn’t allowed to be in general population, and if they ever let me out of my unit I probably wouldn’t be here right now.

SC: So, you weren’t able to participant in the work programs while you were incarcerated?

H: No, I was in a special unit for sex offenders. We weren’t allowed to leave the unit unless it was for medical reasons.

SC: Were there any resources you could use under those restrictions?

H: There aren’t any real resources available to you when you’re in jail. The social worker would come, maybe once every other week to the unit. I needed medication while I was incarcerated, but it’s a lot of work to see a psychiatrist. You needed to put in five requests just to see them one time. If you need medication for anything else, they don’t want to give it to you.

SC: What has been the most difficult part of the re-entry process?

H: Finding a job. It’s been a pain. Because of certain circumstances within my case, I’m limited to the access I have on the internet. Once they see what my original charges are they don’t want me.

SC: Have you sought out any services to help you?

H: Yeah, within the last two months I found NeighborCorps. So far, they’ve helped me mentally. They give me the security that someone is on my side and that they’ll do what they can to understand what I’m going through. I’ve been going to the RUBHC, Rutgers University Behavioral Health Center, for a few years now. They’ve helped me work through mental health problems and taught me different ways of coping.

SC: Have you been working since your release?

H: I’ve been working part-time for the last four years at the Hyacinth AIDS Foundation. It’s a nonprofit organization that helps people live with HIV/AIDS. It’s only 20 hours a week so it doesn’t pay much more than rent.

SC: What do you do there?

H: I do reminder calls, client check-ins, come up with functions, which are fun activities for the clients. I work alongside licensed clinical social workers co-facilitating support groups. I’m not licensed so I just sit-in on discussion and if I can relate to what the clients are talking about I say something. But I can’t give therapeutic advice. I’m able to have a more interpersonal relationship with my clients because I’m dealing with a lot of the same things they are.

SC: How did you get a job there?

H: I was a client for about a year before I was staffed. I heard about them while I was in Middlesex County jail from another inmate, who is also HIV positive. Once I got out I reached out to them to do an intake and became a client. During my time as a client I had been looking for employment. They wanted to help me so when the position became available I applied, but they waited until I figured out my housing situation and I was a bit more stable.

SC: How do you think your incarcerations affected your finances?

H: When I originally got arrested my mom paid for my lawyer. Although it didn’t hurt my pocket I felt the pain, it’s my mother. I felt bad. But since my release in 2004 I’m still trying to get on my feet.

SC: Are you looking for another job to make ends meets?

H: It took a while, but I finally got the courage to start applying to other jobs, something full-time.

SC: Where have you applied?

H: I’ve applied to so many I can’t keep track, most of them were warehouses. I applied to Walmart, but they won’t hire me. They say they’re ‘equal opportunity,’ but they’re not. Well, that’s my opinion. I know people in similar situations, who are worse off, that work for Walmart. I’ve applied to grocery stores, but none have called me back. For the most part jobs can’t look past my record.

SC: How is the search for a full-time job going?

H: A month ago I applied to Amazon. They checked my record seven years back and they hired me. I start next week. I’m not exactly sure what I’ll be doing at their warehouse. I need to go through the new hire orientation first, but it’s 40 hours a week at $13.85 per hour — a lot more than I get now, plus any overtime I do.

SC: In what other ways has your record affected you?

H: Housing. A lot of the houses or rooms in this area are illegal rooms, and the landlords don’t want to deal with the police in any way, shape, or form. If they know you’re on parole or probation they’ll deny you; they’re afraid parole officers are going to report them. The Hyacinth AIDS Foundation had a place that they could house people who have HIV/AIDS, but since it’s federally funded I don’t qualify for that because of my charges. I can’t even get HUD housing or Section 8. My record makes it hard for me to live. Housing around here is expense as hell, and with my part-time job I can barely afford the room that I rent. It puts a really big strain on me.

SC: Have you had any support from family or friends?

H: I have my family, but they’re in different states — Ohio, Indiana, Texas, and Pennsylvania. It’s been rough on them

SC: What are your plans for the future?

H: Once I’ve have some time working at Amazon I want to get my own apartment. I’ve been sharing an apartment with two other people for some time now. All I have is my room everything else is shared.