Cats Claim Victory
In the battle of the pets
Cats are claiming victory
Announcing they are best.
A recent dog news story
Puts arguments to rest.
A spokesman for the cats proclaimed
“In light of breaking news,
We know from what you’ve heard today
It’s cats you’re going to choose.
“Dogs are always ruining stuff,
They love to bite and chew,
But worst of all they lick their butts
And then they’re licking you!
“We find it quite atrocious
That you love them more than cats,
You scoop their poop and hear them bark
While we’re out chasing rats.
“But now we’re vindicated
And canines are out of luck,
When one of yours cannot resist
A silly rubber duck.
“He ate not one, but thirty-two,
According to the vet,
So how can people not admit
That cats are the best pet?”
A companion piece to “I’m just not a dog person” by Joe Váradi