Hey! It’s National Fresh Breath Day!
If it’s August 6th, bad breath would be poorly timed.
It’s National Fresh Breath Day.
I hope you’re doing your part.
Wearing your mask when talking’s
not foolproof, but a good start.
Note: If your breath really stinks,
halitophobia’s not an irrational fear.
If you’re both wearing masks,
and you’re not really sure,
backoff if she starts to tear.
It’s not that I am worried
about my mouthwash failing.
I don’t want hurt feelings when —
“Would you please stop exhaling!”
Oral hygiene is the key,
or hazard the smell of dung.
Brushing teeth is a given,
but not many brush their tongue.
Ninety percent of bad breath
is caused by tongue bacteria.
Your mom told you to brush it,
“Required French kiss criteria!”
Drag a spoon, back of your tongue.
Let it dry — hold to your nose.
If it stinks, spooning’s over.
Wasn’t lust curling…
