May 3rd — National Lumpy Rug Day
with apologies to Topol
If I had a flat rug
(yabba-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dum)
All day long I’d saunter up and down
If my rug was nice and flat
I
Wouldn’t have to stamp hard
(yabba-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dum)
Must admit I feel down in the dumps
Got to find a reason for these bumps
They…might…be
Hordes of roaches, bugs by the dozen
Running up and down beneath my feet
Chewing up the real wooden floors below
There….could…be
One long viper, here to my left
And one even longer to my right
And one more in the middle just for show
Ayh!
If I had a flat rug
(yabba-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dibbi-dum)
I’d lie down and have a little snooze
Nothing would give me the blues
I
Ought to lift a corner
Have a look but I just cannot get the courage up
Lord, it could be lots of hidden stash
Or it could be large amounts of cash
Is this where my wife has stored the trash?
Oh, I want a nice
flat
rug!
https://nationaldaycalendar.com/days-2/national-lumpy-rug-day-may-3/
