The Hiccupping Ninja
Everyone wants to be a ninja…
Naomi wanted to be a ninja
to steal through the night like a whisper.
But there was a flaw in her master plan
a spanner in the works, fingers in the jam.
Whenever Naomi started to creep around
she would make the most ridiculous sound.
Her HIC-cups could be heard throughout the night
giving everyone a terrible fright.
The sound reverberated through the halls
and rattled the glass in everyone’s walls.
Naomi tried everything to make them stop
including dancing with a mop!
But no matter what she did
or how quietly she hid
Naomi would hiccup so loud
it would leave cracks in the ground.
Nothing would make them go away
so one dreadful, miserable day.
Naomi threw her ninja cape aside
ignoring her hurt, pain and lost pride.
Claiming she would never spy again
not even for her very best friend.
Then one day as she walked past her favourite shop
(the very place she bought that mop.)
Naomi saw that something was wrong
where was the shopkeeper singing his famous song?
With a shock and deepening horror
Naomi realised that inside the shop there was a robber!
He had finished smashing up the place
and was now busy filling a suitcase
with all the money from the till
ready to make a dash for the hills.
But Naomi wasn’t going to let that happen
she knew how to send this robber packing.
She crept up slowly behind the door
making sure the thief never saw.
She could feel her diaphragm starting to fill
her hiccups were about to spill.
But she willed them to wait with all her heart
she would need the perfect hiccup start.
The thief moved towards her position by the door
this was the opportunity Naomi foresaw.
Suddenly she jumped out
and the robber gave a shout
as Naomi did the loudest hiccup you have ever heard
the noise it made was quite absurd.
The robber got it full in the face
a hiccup so loud it was heard in space.
Not expecting this deafening roar
the thief collapsed right there on the floor.
Her booming hiccup had drawn a crowd
and Naomi was ever so proud
that her hiccupping had saved the shop —
even if now she couldn’t stop.
The fearful robber was taken away
but he’s still scared of hiccups to this day.
Naomi decided that maybe her gift wasn’t so bad
and for her hiccups she is now glad.
Now Naomi was the ninja she always wanted to be
and if you are lucky you may just see
the swish of her cape or the sounds of stick-up
followed by the echoing boom of Naomi’s hiccups.
