NCIR’ PILIN’ ON
Yay, It’s National Horny Day
Prompted by Laura Sheridan’s National Day Theme*
Are you wond’ring why you’re feeling the jitters,
Like you’ve consumed way too much caffeine?
Maybe it’s your body clock that’s alerting you
It’s National Horny Day, April 16.
But hear me out first, don’t get too excited,
Too early to think about dialing your Ex.
Not inter… but discourse about getting horny.
June 9th is the National Day to have sex.
Now some of you think I’m just pulling your leg
Neither my job, nor a fake news transmitter
If you don’t believe me, of course, you can google
Or check the truth’s ultimate source — Twitter!
No talk of postponing while there’s quarantining,
It’s known the Corona prob’ly crimped your style.
Just allocate part of your stimulus check, then
Put 800-HORN-DOG top of your speed dial.
For you still on lockdown, it is highly likely
Your horniness set-in a long time ago.
But as Fauci said, having sex is a hazard
Hence…
