Leaning in a concerning manner

Rebecca Colby
non-disclosure
Published in
3 min readApr 1, 2020
A courtyard full of palm trees with two people in conversation
My home in the McCoy Family Courtyard at the Knight Management Center. Image credit: Stanford GSB

They say around here you must attend to your personal brand
Better to be hated than forgotten, ignored

I am not from here —
— in fact, I am just a part of their brand —
But I am not immune (to culture)
When the email went out
To everyone
I felt eyes on me
And blushed with pride

“Dear GSB community,”
— and for once, for better or for worse, that included
Me.
She stopped and looked at me
for the first time
and I smiled back

Oh, they tried to chain me up with flimsy yellow tape
As if a wall that could keep us apart
As if:
Stability on this side. | And one (1) unstable palm tree. Over here.

They have taken ownership
of the situation.
It is under control.
They will remove me ASAP,
or so they believe.
Are they afraid we are the same?

But for now I am here
Defiant
Standing tall with my friends close
Cracked but not fallen
Leaning in a concerning manner —
But are they concerned for me, or for themselves?

I can see
As she keeps coming back, eyes shining
That she understands cracks with untold stories
And what comes after.

I watch her do that thing humans do
Putting little pieces of themselves
Into other things
An animal, stuffed or real or imagined
A sound, or a piece of paper
The ocean, or me and my tree friends
All those essential businesses of not giving up

And I know, for her
I am immortal

They chop me and capture value
But still I belong here
Warmed by a flower she leaves in my memory
They chip me and take my stump
But my friends still guard the barren spot of my last stand

They thought they owned me
Still I have strength in my roots, still here

Rest in power

Dear GSB Community,

We currently have a palm tree that has become unstable. It has multiple cracks and is leaning in a concerning manner. We are working with the University Grounds team to remove the tree as quickly as possible, which will likely be Saturday, January 25, 2020. In the meantime, we have cordoned off the mid-section of the McCoy Family Courtyard with caution tape. For your safety avoid this area and walk around the buildings. We will open the walkway again once the area is safe.

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Rebecca Colby
non-disclosure

Stanford MBA ’20, MIT MechE ’13, recovering aerospace engineer. Poems, novels, blimps, central banking, coffee, bunnies, and football.