We asked MBA2's returning from a summer back in the “real world”: Have you changed? How? What about your GSB experience influenced these changes, and are they something you’d like to maintain or reverse?
Edited By Jess Adepoju
Sean Dillard:
Once the sound of the squealing tires faded from my ears, only the rhythm of my intensely beating heart remained. A quick glance in my rearview mirror showed confused looks on the two men’s faces as they headed back inside.
Well, that was weird.
I couldn’t blame them for interrupting; it was a bizarre sight to stumble upon. A white man with his shirt inside-out (why the fuck did I wear a Stanford shirt) and a Nikon d3500, furiously snapping photos of the Murfreesboro Motel, as if he were collecting evidence for a crime scene or stealing a competitor’s intellectual property. The ding of the bell to the office door alerted me to their approach and I hurriedly jumped in my car, slammed the door and floored the gas before they even had a chance to start a conversation.
I’m sorry but I don’t want to talk to you.
It would just be too difficult to explain. Hundreds of grown adults had lived in this place as children and hadn’t been back to see it since. It would be impossible to convey the sentimentality of this place and what it means to me now as an MBA student at Stanford.
While I did my best to leave this place untouched, as a piece of fine art in my memory not to be disturbed, being back in this place and the many others I visited on my road trip through the South this summer reminded me just how much I have changed since my time there. And during my times of insecurity about my career choices or public speaking ability or social graces (mostly lack thereof), I think back to these places, the people who are there now, and what it means to have left it all behind.
In kindergarten, my teacher held a jumping contest. We lined up against the wall, and as we jumped as high as we could, Mrs. Thompson marked with tape the height we reached. As the shortest person in the class, I was upset about the judging criteria — although I was a great jumper, I could not compete against the taller students.
In those moments, I have to remind myself — sometimes it’s not just about how high you jump, but also how far.
Deirdre Clute:
This summer I felt content. Prior to the GSB I would have seen this as uninspired, stationary, mediocre. When I hear this word now, I feel grounded, encouraged, and proud. GSB has forced me to rethink how I approach my life priorities. I’ve recognized the difference between writing out my priorities based on where I spend my time and writing out my priorities based on what I refuse to sideline.
Much of this growth I attribute to my classmates, and their genuine curiosity in other people. Their curiosity requested simple answers to simple questions, and I could not deliver. Encouraged to speak out loud as I mentally juggled respectable answers, I learned a lot from my own processing, and others’ observation of it. They asked about my family. How I express my love for them. Without pause, I would describe them as my top priority. Yet I realized I hadn’t visited them once, despite their proximity to campus. Classmates trying to understand my sexuality gave me great clarity on my desire to date both men and women, and what that means to me. Questions around goals and how I challenge myself helped me refine the bullseye I’m aiming for, and why I chose it. Each question pushed me to evaluate if the priorities I communicate line up with the priorities I act on.
Without a doubt I will take these changes with me beyond the GSB. Partly, because I think it would take more effort to go back than it would to go forward. But largely because expressing these previously silent internal monologues has helped me identify what is core to my joy and my energy. My core feels more solid, more able to support future growth. I feel content.
Divyanka Sharma:
The main change I’ve seen in myself is how much more committed I am to deepening relationships and pushing myself to grow in ways I can only do at the GSB. Going into the summer, I didn’t fully internalize how short our time is here and the time away from school fully underscored that for me. While my summer was fulfilling in its own way — I got to work on projects that were important to the company and learned useful skills I did not have — something I really missed was the powerful, motivated and driven community that we have at the GSB.
This has informed my decision to look for ways to stay closer to my family and friends after graduating. I appreciate this change in me and I would like to continue pushing myself to be open to new people who could leave a mark on my life the way many GSBers have.
George Amirdzhanyan:
Going back to the real world allowed me to re-evaluate some goals I had. First, finally getting hands-on experience in finance allowed me to understand where I want to continue my career. Second, changing the location helped to relax and re-energize before the upcoming challenges of finding full-time employment. And, third, the time that I had with family and friends helped to always remember about not forgetting your close ones even when super busy. Overall, that was a great break not only in terms of finally understanding where to focus next, but also re-evaluating what’s important in life. Cheers!
Will Ritter:
I think the biggest way I was changed this summer is in my relationship with work. Spending the summer working on two passions — music and social change — have reawakened a love of work for me. It’s given me a line of sight into what I need for a healthy relationship with work, and has rekindled confidence that I’ll have a fulfilling career.
Ellen Liu:
The tapestry of my life can be described as a matte weave punctuated by colorful splashes of growth and change. This past year at the GSB has been one of those splashes, and I’ve tried to distill my learnings into the few messy points below:
Work: I’m regaining my “bias to action,” which is a jargon-y way of saying: Taking control of my career in a sea of possibility is exhilarating. It’s OK if the uncertainty is terrifying; just don’t let it be crippling.
Friends: It sounds silly, but I used to hear people talking about their BFF from childhood or college and envy the closeness. I thought I’d missed the boat on friendship but have never been more wrong. This past year has given me my closest friends and the tools to spark, mend and nurture these unbelievable relationships.
Family: One weekend I flew to Houston and surprised my family. My parents had no idea, and it was one of the most satisfying triumphs of the summer. But I also went home to spark a difficult conversation from which Old Ellen would have run away. I didn’t handle it perfectly; actually, the execution was pretty sloppy. But the GSB’s mantra of “vulnerable-Touchy-Feely-it’s-ok-to-fail” gives me the courage to try and try again.
Upon reflection on this past year, I am proud of how far I’ve come and excited to see how far I’ll go. I am so grateful to my friends and family for embarking on this journey with me. To them I say: Please stick with me, and I promise it will be an adventure. One day, when I’m a Crazy Rich Asian, I’ll make a movie about my GSB experience: How Ellen Got Her Groove Back.
