Domestic Violence Awareness Month-Stop Violence against Women
If we ask anyone today,” Do they know someone who has undergone some form of domestic violence?”, a substantial percentage would know someone where they work or study, in their neighborhood, and/or in their circle of friends and family. Victims of domestic violence come from all walks of life, varying age groups, backgrounds, communities, education levels and lifestyles. I happened to meet one such successful and brave domestic violence survivor, who I worked with, who has had terrible experiences. Her story is nothing short of inspirational, and as we celebrate the Domestic Violence Awareness Month (DVAM) this October, her story will inspire everyone to spread more awareness about this serious violent crime that can include both physical and emotional abuse.
She was on top of the world after winning a beauty pageant, who wouldn’t be? After all she epitomized beauty, personality, and grace. But she also was a domestic violence survivor.
Instead of feeling empowered to have attained a platform where she could use her voice to reach the masses to inspire and speak about issues she cared about, her own voice was lost in the harrowing experience that followed. Her boyfriend/partner, who was also her manager, could not deal with her fame and started abusing her physically and mentally. During that time, he found ways to isolate and keep her from meeting any of her friends or family and would beat her if she refused to comply. He would lock her in their house for days and not give her much to eat. Abused by her intimate partner, she experienced a devastating betrayal committed by someone she viewed as her closest ally and also became increasingly isolated from friends and everyone who could help her. It was after about seven months, suffering from more repeated and systematic violence at the hands of her boyfriend, that she got a chance to escape from her boyfriend’s house. She ran and took shelter at her close friend’s house, who she confided in, and who encouraged her to file a complaint with the local authorities. Spurred by her friend who gave her the confidence to speak up, she mustered the courage to report the matter to the authorities, and her boyfriend was arrested.
Even though the perpetrator of the violence was out of her life, the whole experience left psychological scars on her. The anxiety due to living in ongoing danger had shaken her world view from having been betrayed by a trusted person. However, not giving up on her hope to lead a normal life she came to the United States to start anew. Today she has completed her degree in architecture and is working as a successful architect, and she speaks about spreading more awareness about domestic violence. In her opinion, the biggest challenge to overcome domestic violence is changing the way people see themselves. People who have experienced domestic violence are afraid to talk to someone or feel ashamed to open up about violence they face at home. In a lot of cases, domestic violence goes unreported due to matters of social silence and inhibition.
Domestic Violence is a huge public health issue. It undermines the social, economic, psychological, spiritual and emotional well being of the victim. Global estimates published by the World Health Organisation indicate that about 1 in 3 women worldwide have experienced either physical and/or sexual violence in their lifetime [1]. Yet this silent epidemic is often swept under the rug and many victims suffer in silence not knowing where to seek help. Women are the major targets of domestic violence. According to the National Center on PTSD, due to women’s higher likelihood of experiencing trauma, including domestic violence, they have a ten percent chance of developing the condition, while men’s odds stand at 4% [2]. However, the number of women affected by domestic violence is difficult to identify precisely due to definitional issues and underreporting.
We have to take steps to protect women and to help promote a culture that does not allow or accept violence against women. There are many ways we can work to end domestic violence — creating more awareness and public education efforts to change the social climate of silence, tolerance and inhibition. If you see or experience any form of domestic violence call helplines which connect to the local domestic violence services, support groups and/or websites that act and help survivors of domestic violence rebuild their lives. They can also help with employment services to provide training, personalized assistance and build capacity for employment.
Every woman has the right to live a free and safe life.
JOIN US ON OCTOBER 24TH FOR ‘THE ART OF SURVIVAL’
Come and join Nonviolence International New York as we celebrate -’ The Art of Survival’ a Domestic Violence Awareness Month Event that showcases the strength of domestic violence survivors. Click on the link below to know more-
References:
[1] ‘Violence against Women’, World Health Organisation,United Nations.
Declaration on the elimination of violence against women. New York : UN, 1993, http://www.who.int/news-room/fact-sheets/detail/violence-against-women
[2]’Women trauma and PTSD’, [https://www.ptsd.va.gov/public/PTSD-overview/women/women-trauma-and-ptsd.asp]
