3 Things That Improve Communication In ANY Relationship That You Can Start Doing Today
Look. You’re stuck with your partner, your parents, your roommate, or whoever for a little while you’re social distancing. Maybe you want to practice these three things that make it super easy to improve communication ASAP. WARNING: These are boyfriend tested, no boyfriend harmed in the making of this blog.
“Yes and”
I read about this in a blog and it was the easiest thing to apply to my relationship. It is also used in improv classes. The idea is to cut negativity out and automatically validate anything your partner says and you can do it right now!
Picture this, it’s Friday night at 6 PM, DATE NIGHT. You’re hungry. Bae is hungry. You ask Bae what they want to eat, they say “Pad Thai”, you say “Not that”. Fast forward 20 minutes later: you’re hangry and don’t even want to go on a date.
Instead, you can decide to get off this vicious merry-go-round and start saying “Yes and I also was craving sushi”. You’d be surprised what happens, maybe you find a hot new restaurant that offers pad thai AND sushi. Maybe you decide to go to the grocery store and get both. There are so many positive paths that you open yourself up to when you just say “Yes and” and your partner feels accepted!
This works on more than just your partner BTW, I have used it at work and with my mom and I have made what could’ve turned into a negative experience, something 10x better!
“Something I noticed and appreciated about you”
Heard this one on the “Relationship Alive!” podcast. (Don’t knock it til you try it, okay! My favorite episodes are the ones with the Gottmans). Literally, so easy just find something specific about what your partner did for you today and say “Something I noticed and appreciated about you today is that you took the dog for a walk while I was taking a work call”. Boom! Simple.
It really started making a difference and made me feel seen when my boyfriend started doing it. This one is kind of easy to get your partner to reciprocate and it isn’t hard to think of! The important thing to remember is to make it specific to that day if you can. Then do it EVERY DAY!
Go Out Of Your Way Have Fun
My boyfriend and I just went through significant life changes: we moved states, changed jobs and planned a few months long distance for his job training. The few months we spent planning and anticipating these changes were stressful. It felt like all we talked about was the future and ask questions we didn’t/couldn’t have the answer to.
So one day I took a note from 2012 Twitter (I think?) and I bought off-brand Nerf Guns for $6 at Walmart. Yes, maybe I spent 10 minutes in the toy aisle debating the difference between Nerf and the generic brand, then I came home and gave my boyfriend 10 seconds to grab his gun and find shelter before I lit his ass up. Something about this just made it easy to laugh and relax even though we were both scared. We used those knock-off guns a lot after that for random ambushes, so I got my money worth.
3 Things That Improve Communication In ANY Relationship That You Can Start Doing Today, these were all tools that I added to my tool belt that help me create better communication for me and my loved one. I don’t do them every day and I don’t do them perfectly, but I try and when I try it helps. Hope this helps you!
