but. wow…

20171128-1123ish report

the usual caveats apply:

i can only do it as soon as i can process it.

i am under a lot of stress.

i am not recovered, and i am still having to fight alarmingly hard for my necessary paths to recovery.

but.

wow.

compared to just a few weeks ago, there are a LOT more things i can do.

i am having to get trickier. this is a clever game of interacting with my environment, playing chess with populations of microbes that affect everything, everything at all times. (!)

these populations have been proven worthy adversaries and very worthy allies, too. i aim for improved communications and respectful diplomacy.

we seem to have orchestrated a cautious truce.

a variety of new things have become possible for me to do for very brief periods of time -- then i must immediately stop and "rest aggressively" :-) to avoid crisis later on

there is perhaps a handful of things i was severely limited in before that now i notice i can do for longer time periods, under specifically planned circumstances, and proceed far more smoothly than previously. these still risk unanticipated reactions or crashing afterwards, but i am beginning to see myself as more truly potentially operational.

huge amount of detailed specifics to accomplish this. still battling for resources we are missing for safety, and getting to a more stable routine in a place i might not have to leave within weeks --

but

the part where it is POSSIBLE AT ALL

is completely freakin rad.

and man, i have nowhere near processed *that.*

but i am gonna keep trying to surf it

and reporting back!

🌫️🌊🐚🌊🌫️